Rural Dictionary

chuck norris

I love the man, but I'm not going to go on with that, but rather prove a point to all the "Bruce Lee is better than Chuck Norris" bitches out there... Whose still alive? and how do you think Brandon Lee died?
As for Jackie Chan, He was in the movie The Tuxedo, instantly stripping him of his testicles.
Steven Segal is mounted above Chuck Norris' fireplace in his oklahoma home. Before he was locked in a cage and randomly and submissively beaten by chuck.
Jean Claude Van Damme died in a freak "had an appendage hastily removed after doing the splits on a chair and one of the chairs being roundhouse kicked out from underneath him" accident.
Chuck Norris once invited all of the other badasses from TV to duke it out in order to see who was the supreme badass. Only two showed up-- Jack Bauer and MacGyver.
Luckily for Mr. T., him and Chuck Norris have remained good friends throughout the years.
that covers any and every possible martial aritst/ t.v. badass ever.
MacGyver immediately tried to make a bomb out of some Q-Tips and Gatorade, but Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the solar plexus. MacGyver promptly threw up his own heart.

Jack Bauer tried to use his detailed knowledge of torture techniques, but to no avail: Chuck Norris thrives on pain. Chuck Norris then ripped off Jack Bauer's arm and beat him to death with it. Game, set, match.