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Schrodinger's initiative

In DND... You and your team have to roll for initiative against a creature that is rated at a CR high enough to wipe out your party in one round.

New player: I'd like to take a swing at Santa.
Vertern player: no you don't.

New player. Does a 21 hit?
DM: not even close
Vertern player: Idiot! Santa is a level 20 Arch Fey!
DM: someone's on the naughty list, roll for initiative.

Vertern player: dead or alive, this is a Schrodinger's initiative. We dead, no cap.

by Exoudi December 28, 2023


Schrodinger's Blowjob

The act of receiving a blowjob while at a sex party (sexoska) and almost falling asleep next to the love-making male-female couple who might happen to be your friends and are hidden under the blanket. It is usually linked with a dilemma of whether to look under the blanket or just let it be.

Hey pal, I was getting a Schrodinger's blowjob yesterday but really had no idea whether it was Andy or Mary schmosomimly sloppily blowing me.

by higlandoutdoordaddy December 22, 2022


Schrodingaling

A penis so small that you can't tell if they have one or not

Do you have a schrodingaling or...?

by Zubo July 01, 2023


Schrodinger's Lawyer

A lawkeeper who decides whether they're client should plead guilty based on the verdict of the jury

Jury: *Whispering* Yeah, he's probably guilty

Schrodinger's Lawyer: Nows your chance!

Client: I plead guilty to the first degree murder of a family of 4

Jury: Oh, we were going to say he's not guilty, but whatever

Client: Aaaaaaaaaagggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh

Schrodinger's Lawyer: Oops

by KorokDude August 25, 2023


Schrodinger's slur

Schrodinger's slur is simultaneously an offensive term for someone of a certain ethnicity, and at the same time a fun nickname when used by friends.

Karen: You damned dirty SPICS.
Juan: How dare you!!

Julio: What's up you dirty spic?!
Juan: Not much bro what's up?
Michael: What just happened?
Juan: Schrodinger's slur.

by FreeCuba September 16, 2021


Schrodinger's Shaft

Also called Schrodinger's Shaft and Balls, is when you send someone a dick pic but show everything but the tip, until the tip is shown the dick could be anywhere between as long as the amount of shaft shown, or infinitely long.

Person 1: Damn my dick is tiny
Person 2: Just cover up the tip
Person 1: Why?
Person 2: Schrodinger's shaft, infinite dick length bro
Person 1: Bro...

by Shitting on the floor November 15, 2020


Schrodinger's Sammy

A paradox of quantum superposition.

The peculiar rules of quantum theory means that Sammy both loves H and is still thinking about it at the same time.

Sammy: I love you, but I'm still thinking about it.
H: That's even worse than Schrodinger's cat, that's Schrodinger's Sammy

by h06i10 January 08, 2023