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A sexual act where a person defecates into a hockey glove and masturbates to moose porn.
Gordon Brown, an expert in Canada's History, always used CCM gloves for ultimate performance.
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A sexual act more vulgar, depraved, and degrading than The Aristocrats. A woman is bound and gagged and forced down onto her hands and knees, where a man pours several bottles of maple syrup on the Stanley Cup before forcibly inserting it into her ass. The woman must then keep the trophy in her ass as the man stands the Stanley Cup upright. He then puts on a set of moose antlers, climbs up the cup and on top of the woman, where he fucks her pussy and forces the Stanley Cup deeper into her ass.
Any man that can perform Canada's History on a woman must be a god!
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A sexual act so deviant it cannot be mentioned on TV or in front of an actual Canadian in fear that they might collapse and die of shock instantly. To perform a Canada's History the male partner must be wearing moose antlers and the female partner must be covered in maple syrup, The male then ejaculates into the Stanley cup then analy penetrates the female with a hockey stick while chanting O'Canada as he pours the contents of the Stanley cup on the female's head.
If the Penguins ask for their Stanley Cup back tell them to wash it first because I just gave Nancy a lesson on Canada's History. Also, How do you get dried maple syrup out of your pubes?
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The act of inserting a penis into a toaster to heat thing's up in the bedroom or re-energize yourself for even more hot sex. Formerly known as the Beaver, but the term was thought to be too dirty.
I came so many times last night with my girl that I had to preform Canada's History to get myself back into the game.
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1. Sex with Stephen Colbert, or masturbating to a sexual fantasy involving Stephen Colbert.
2. Sexual acts using maple syrup as a lubricant; so named because it is often a very memorable experience.
3. The term for a group of sex acts so depraved that even to describe them to a consenting adult in the privacy of your home amounts to a violation of censorship laws.
4. The term given to a case history of someone who suffers from a rare sexual disorder resulting from their involvement in sex acts perpetrated by officials employed by the Canadian government during the late 1990's and early 2000's.
1. Your friend: Do you fantasize about Jon Stewart?
You: Sure, Jon Stewart is great. But tonight I feel the only thing that's really going to hit the spot is a little lesson in "Canada's History" (wink, wink).
2. Your friend: What did you do last night?
You: I gave my girl a bit of Canada's History she won't soon forget!
3. We were feeling especially naughty, so we talked about Canada's History all night.
4. Psychiatrist 1: I really wanted to help that poor man, but I had no choice but to tell him that our clinic could not assist him in any way.
Psychiatrist 2: Why not?
Psychiatrist 1: He was afflicted with Canada's History.
Psychiatrist: Those syrup-sucking bastards...
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Shoving everything you have inside everywhere you can all at once, screaming, vomiting, urinating and evacuating your bowels all at once.
That girl and I just performed Canada's History in three minutes flat!
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A term referring to the past of the GREAT nation of Canada. However, some mistaken it with a sex act due to misinformation from Stephen Corbert.
Stephen Corbert does not know about Canada's History.
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