Random
Source Code
Random
Get the best head from anyone for a day!
Friend: OMG IT'S FREE HEAD DAY
Me: >:)
Being born into the servitude of ones choosing.
Why arent we doing what we love all day dog? Shit bruh we were born free slaves.
When a female has just a shirt on and no pants or underwear.
Yo, have you ever seen shelly, she's always free lippin it in the lockerroom
when you free your dick from your pants and let it breath.
damn my penis feels restricted i should free the tip
Code word for the intended target of a malicious action or other ill-intended deeds.
"Have you told Jeffrey about the free camping yet?"
"I have and I do believe he will be joining us."
I HATE SPOTIFY IT IS MAKING ME LOOSE MY MIND.
I'm actually going insane it's not a joke. For those of you with Spotify premium you will never understand our pain... never mind the CONSTANT ads-literally every 5 minutes- Spotify doesn't think my discernment is good enough tor picking one song. No spotify has 5 more recommended songs to play in front of my desired song. It feels classist I can't explain why it just does... and now Spotify is taking away our lyric reading rights! It feels like an injustice. And dear Spotify, due to how bad you have treated me I will never EVER cave. You will not have my money. You have broken my trust.
Switching to pirating music ❤️ (joking for legal reasons)
Me and my loved ones at a funeral~ "sweetie you are in charge of the playlist after all this was your best friend, they would want you to do the honors..put some Spotify on"
"really are you sure...?"
"Yes love put together a playlist please."
*A curated 5 hour sad music playlist playing*
Ave Maria finishes playing** Spotify thinks she got it from here and puts on bad feeling (oompa loompa)
(sped up vers.)
"This is so disrespectful!!!!, I can't believe you would play this at your best friends funeral!!"
*all loved ones shun you*
'In the car'
Let me put on some music!- *you will get 30 minutes of uninterrupted listening after this short break* (lies) "tampax can protect just like pads!!!😁😁😁😁🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉
Friend later* Marsai Martin isn't real she can't hurt you, i'll put on some calming music...
"Marsai
Martin here!! ok true story! One time while vacationing in the Bahamas-
“AHHHH SKIP IT PLEASE SKIP”
"I can't Spotify free froze the screen!!"
"You ran out of skips!!!!"
something that europeans say that make americans pass out or even die
European friend: free healthcare is a great idea !
Me:y-
American Friend: *collapses*