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Random
To consult among colleagues or peer group.
We are consultating regarding a new product in development
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A person who will never make six figures and will definitely not be able to have a starting salary of $140,000. Consultants are often considered the least interesting people in the office, and are often hated by everyone.
Dave is going to be a consultant
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Abbreviation for 'Associate Consultant', some bullshit job title to give younger employees a false sense of hope that their job means something. Commonly found in rural consultancies in St. Ives. Sometimes loaned out sexually to clients to secure deals.
Client: 'The proposal is pretty good, but the quote is too high'
Hobb Knob: 'Have one of my ass. consultants for the night, not the yank though, he's spoiled goods and has an arse like a grapefruit'
Client: 'Deal, we'll sign off in the morning'
Specialist consultants brought in to tip the balance of vital swing stages during elections.
The Donald: We're down in the polls, bring in the consultants of swing for Florida.
Advisor: I'm on it
The Donald: Remember, no Russians. NO COLUSION.
World domination through the power of positive thinking and outlandish work ethic. Generating success through the "work hard, play hard" enviroment while caring and helping others reach a milestone in their career.
Today is my day to start Milestone Consulting.
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Independent contractors brought in by upper management under the auspices of "streamlining work flow", but in actuality to suggest what positions can be eliminated thus reducing headcount and overhead for purposes of downsizing.
In the movie "Office Space" the characters referred to as "The Bobs" are classic examples of chainsaw consultants. The main character avoids being fired through a combination of unexpected brutal honesty about his lack of passion for his position, and also engendering camaraderie with those sent to determine if his
job is really necessary.
A parasite that contributes nothing to the network and is only looking for ways to stay on the payroll. This is the individual at the burger joint that asks “do you want fries with that?” The network Consultant is constantly looking for useless network tweaks to justify his presence at a customer site. Be especially weary of the Euro-trash no talent hack type; this character dazzles senior management with a ridiculous accent all the while unraveling the solid network that’s in place. Network consultants never look at a network as a whole, but only analyze bits and pieces of it. In this manner they always have work do to since the last project they completed broke some other part of the network.
I’m gonna have to give nickel blow jobs in the street to get my self respect back after taking this network consultant job.
If that network consultant was on fire; I wouldn’t piss on him.
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