Well fuck me in the ass and call me daddy

Used when someone is shocked because something they didn't expect happened.

Can also be used when someone thinks they screwed up.

Yeah, we've got a test tomorrow. Didn't you know?
Well fuck me in the ass and call me daddy. I'm so screwed.

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Well, fuck me dead and bury me pregnant!

Can be used with or without the "Well". Australian equivalent of the American "Well, stick a fork in me because I am done!" Expression of surprise or disgust, or of having absolutely nothing else to say, or of being flummoxed, bewildered, dismayed, stunned, or perplexed. Acronyms: WFMDABMP, FMDABMP, WFMD, FMD. For some really good examples, watch the Australian movie "Welcome to Woop Woop". BTW, FMD would be an appropriate Australian response for an Australian completely mortified by an American telling him that his favorite Australian movie is "Welcome to Woop Woop".

American: "My favorite Australian movie is 'Welcome to Woop Woop'."
Australian: "I am grossly mortified! Not all Australians are like that! That movie does not accurately reflect Australia!"
American: "Well, fuck me dead! I live in Los Angeles and you're telling me that movies aren't real?"

Question from atop the toilet: "Where's the toilet paper?"

Answer: "We're out of toilet paper."
Response: "Well, fuck me dead and bury me pregnant!"

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well fuck me in the ass and call me queer

showing a state of suprise

Guy: Dude, that guy just got shot up on the block by a gang of well hung hispanics with glocks and m16s!
Other Guy: Well fuck me in the ass and call me queer!?!?!?!

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Well, Fuck Me Gently with a 10 foot barge pole.

Surprise or exclamation.

A long time not seeing a particularly good friend.

Hi John.

"Well, Fuck Me Gently with a 10 foot barge pole.",Bob, how you doing you old wanker.

Fine But, hows you.

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Well Fuck me with a drum stick and call me Mrs. Cool

A state of being surprised and having a liking of Tre' Cool.
Also Just wanting Tre' Cool.

Did you see that Janie and Larz are going out now?
Well Fuck me with a drum stick and call me Mrs. Cool.

Also:
Hey i read Tre' cool's birth name is Frank Edwin Wright the Third.
Well Fuck me with a drum stick and call me Mrs. Cool.

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Well fuck me with a sack o' potatoes

A phrase used when feeling both annoyed and upset.

Person 1: This guy is targeting me specifically.
Person 2: Leave the game then.
Person 1: Well fuck me with a sack o' potatoes.

Well fuck me dead

an Australian way of expressing surprise

spy:i'm scout's dad
sniper:well fuck me dead
spy:tf