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the woodlands

^^I don't know what they're talking about, but The Woodlands is anything but ghetto. Everyone here is a white Abercrombie & Fitch/Hollister clone who drives a BMW and carries a Dooney & Bourke bag. The girls all look the exact same. There is no origionality, individuality, or culture here at all. Get me out now.

Theres nothing to do in the Woodlands, so lets go roll in Oak Ridge.

by iRock June 26, 2006

347πŸ‘ 279πŸ‘Ž


The Woodlands

The woodlands, a place outside of Houston. Yet everyone who lives in TW loves to claim they from houston, slapping β€œhouston” in their bio, along with the grape emoji, gas, red random Chinese letter emojis. The woodlands is where white people dominant the population. Here you will find many sluts, who will happily fuck your boyfriend with no remorse. The woodlands has the shittiest football team, and every guy from here will basically rape u at a party. All of them are subtly racist, but they continue to hang with black & mexicans. You can find 90% of the white people saying β€œnigga” to blend in with their black friends. They all claim they are gang, yet half of them haven’t shot a gun. Throw them in southeast Houston and they will come back deceased. Girls spread their legs faster than melted butter on bread. Guys will stick their dick in anything that walks. Girls here have shit makeup, and slutty clothes. All the guys here claim to have a huge dick and great sex game, but I found out personally that they have 4 inchers and bust in 2 seconds. The girls have the loosest pussys. Basically, don’t even come to the woodlands unless you’re white and rich. Save yourself from this white washed place and go to houston.

Jack: Hey, I’m from the woodlands
Zach: oh the whitest place near Houston?
Jack: Hell yeah!

by Baddiewithoutafattie June 23, 2018

7πŸ‘ 3πŸ‘Ž


The Woodlands

The Woodlands is a cookie cutter town straight out of a suburbia catalogue. Unfortunately, there is no idividuality in the two high schools. Its pretty much a party hard or die a horrible bloody social death type of town, with absolutely nothing to do. Most people think this is the ideal place to raise their kids, but I dont find it cute to see my six year old brother come home from school singing about apple bottom jeans and dropping the f-bomb.

The Woodlands senior slogan: get me outta here. NOW.

by A-lyss May 5, 2008

180πŸ‘ 184πŸ‘Ž


woodland

woodland junior high in arkansas is much better than their rivals ramay. the woodland cowboys have many championships in all sports. honestly just go to woodland. the ramay indians suck!

Drew: omg woodland won last night!

Lily: yea so what else is new?

by vllyblgrl October 22, 2019

4πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž


The Woodlands

The town north of Houston with a population just under 100,000 where about 10% of the population is poor or middle class, and the rest are...not. It is a town where people are supposed to cherish the environment through several programs and the environmentally friendly layout of the town, yet many residents own/are involved with oil companies. It is a town where all parents talk about what a "family-friendly community" it is, while their kids smoke crack and have an orgy in the backyard because they're too busy going to yoga classes to notice. It is a town where The John Cooper School is located...the well-known private school where most students get a sports car for their 16th birthday (not an exaggeration), and some millionaires are considered poor. It is a town where in the PUBLIC SCHOOLS, a kid driving a 2003 BMW is considered poor. It is a town where the first ad you see in the local magazine is either Gucci, Lamborghini, or Rolex. It is a town where, when in an aircraft, one might mistake a neighborhood for an unusually close group of Walmarts. It is a town where most residents under the age of 8 don't know what a Walmart is. It is a town where a 10-year-old without an iPhone is an outcast. It is a town where despite a "love of the environment", the plant people tend to love the most there is weed. It is a town where that is the only kind of weed people are aware of, because they all have gardeners.

Joe: My cousin lives in The Woodlands.

Josh: Does he have a ferrari?

Joe: He got one for his birthday, along with a helicopter.

by fairysprinklesalpacadoomorange February 6, 2012

25πŸ‘ 26πŸ‘Ž


The Woodlands

A town north of Houston with the assiest people around. Stuck up snobs they are but with an awesome reputation in EVERYTHING! I don\'t know whether to be proud or embarassed.

Big house, expensive house, fake boys, fake girls, best schools

by Geuhlee April 27, 2005

122πŸ‘ 269πŸ‘Ž


The Woodlands

FUCK THIS TOWN

John: Hey honey, do you wanna move to The Woodlands?

Sally: Hey fuckface, do you want our daughter to be a blonde clone of every fucking person in The Woodlands? Do you want our son to be a pothead/alcoholic? Do you wanna get a divorce?

John: Good point, maybe we shouldn't

Sally: No shit

by TTI December 31, 2009

95πŸ‘ 244πŸ‘Ž