Measurable Eternity

A known period of time that isn't really that long but still seems to take forever.

Examples:

The last day of school before summer vacation begins.

The last 10 minutes of work before a 3 day weekend.

Waiting through all the ads and trailers before the movie you went to see starts.

Any business meeting.

Our weekly staff meeting at work was another measurable eternity. With every minute that passed I could feel whole geological epochs passing.

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whore's measure

The length of a man's penis, measured along the top.

My boyfriend reckons he's 8" long, but he measures from underneath to fool himself into thinking it's longer; the whore's measure is really only 6".

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Measured compliment

A vague and insincere compliment used to be polite in a case of something awful, i.e. a terrible play, song, art piece, et cetera.

Man 1: "Oh, what a joy. By the way, the sound...is great."
Man 2: "Good, that's good to hear."
Man 3: "Thank you for that measured compliment."

mississippi measurement

The Mississippi measurement is a method of measuring ones dick by which the end of the tape measure starts at the asshole.

The wife says I've got a small cock, but I'm all ,"Bitch that shit's seven inches with the Mississippi measurement."

stealth measuring

exploiting mechanics to measure distances in a table top war game where one is not allowed to check distances freely

We said no stealth measuring! If you want to measure before every action go play 10th Edition!

Lundie Measure

A Lundie Measure is an massive measure of grain based spirit such as gin or vodka. It is achieved by appearing to pour the spirit into a measure but ensuring that half the spirit is pouring straight into the glass. The excess is hidden by a mixer or ice.

Sally looks stressed, I’ll pour her a Lundie Measure.

Last Measure

Last Measure is a pop-up shock site by the GNAA (Gay Nigger Association of America) featuring various shock site pics, including Tubgirl, Meatspin and goatse.cx. It is also accompanied by a NSFW audio exclaimg "HEY EVERYBODY, I'M LOOKING AT GAY PORNO!". It is also known to give your computer viruses. If you ever come across of it, DO NOT FUCKING CLICK ON IT!!!

"Holy shit, I just clicked on a link to Last Measure!"

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