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Newton

When you beat off while taking a shit, while timing it so you drop a huge log right as you spurt, causing an "equal but opposite" reaction.

He's been in the bathroom for a long-ass time...

Yeah, he's probably pullin' a Newton

by Mike January 21, 2006

307πŸ‘ 172πŸ‘Ž


Newtoning

to solve math problems like a boss,

Kid: What are you doing in math class?

Wyeth: Newtoning!

by Sir.IsaacNewton February 19, 2015

6πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž


Newton

Newton, Iowa used to be known for two things: Maytag and meth. Maytag moved to Mexico.
Oh, the glory of trailer parks and rundown houses with cars that cost more than 10 years rent parked in the front yard. For entertainment, one can drive up and down the main street to show off your ridiculous spoiler and ground effects. Or, if you'd rather spend your last $5 on a 40 oz. rather than gas, you can watch the retard parade cruise by over and over while hanging out in the corner of the Hy-Vee parking lot...or, if you are feeling classy, you can rock it with the lovely and classy folk of the downtown square area. Baby on hip and beer in the hand? You'll fit right in!
Of course, no mid-sized Iowa town in complete without the pretentious sub-divisions surrounding the meth-rot filled downtown. THOSE folk know how to party AND become sports stars! Old washed-up football player? Newton is the perfect place to brainwash your child into believing high school sports are life, pumping him full of PCP, and watching him lead the Cardinals to state!

"It's Newton on a friday night...what to do?"

"Let's go steal from the Super Walmart!"

by ho-face killa June 15, 2008

72πŸ‘ 44πŸ‘Ž


Newtoned

When an older man is having sex with a younger man doggystyle and the older mans elongated ball sack(due to gravity) slams into the younger mans ballsack in front of him causing pain and resembling the action of the balls on a Newtons Cradle which is found on many desks. Newtons 4th law of motion.

I was having sex with my boss at the office so I could get Friday off. He was giving it to me hard when all of the sudden he got into a funky rythmn and his saggy balls " Newtoned" me.

by patm1r January 24, 2015


Newton

The bestest friend you could ever have that will always have your back. The best person you’ll ever meet in your lifetime.

β€œWho’s that over there?”
β€œOh that’s newton, he’s my best friend.”
β€œOh he looks really cool.”

by Kaytlin Savoie May 16, 2020

4πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž


Newton

The guy who invented gravity so that we dont need to tie ourselves to the bed each night.

newton is teh smart!!!11

by some guy December 16, 2004

46πŸ‘ 41πŸ‘Ž


Newton

The first popular PDA from Apple Computer. Early versions of the newton were slow and had poor handwriting recognition, but later revisions were very useful devices.

Newton was for a while a catch-all term to describe any PDA, in the same way as palmpilot and the british use of Hoover to describe any vacuum cleaner.

"I can't use my Newton with my new mactop so I had to buy a Palm"

by Shalroth May 13, 2005

20πŸ‘ 17πŸ‘Ž