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The act of receiving a less than stellar blowjob from some rando life coach behind a dumpster on top of a mattress after bar close.
Life Coach: Hi dude I never met before 10 minutes ago! Want to cuddle on this perfectly good mattress that was thrown away?
Dude: Ummm, ok.
(Both lie down together)
Life Coach: Want to make out?
Dude: Sure why not?
(Proceed to make out)
Dude: Hey you're not bad with your tongue.
Life Coach: You have no idea! Would you like a dumpster mattress blowjob!?
Dude: Yolo
The layer of snow on the roof of a car or truck. They are seen when someone drives around having failed to remove it from the top of their car/truck and can slide off and hit people or other vehicles. snow, snow storm, ice, blizzard, cars, trucks, road, highway, ice scraper, mattress
I got pummeled by a driver’s snow mattress while I was walking down the street yesterday.
When you live above the 40th parallel and you don't have a garage to keep your car in during the winter, you may find yourself driving around with an 8 inch thick slab of snow on the hood of your vehicle.
I thought that it was starting to snow while driving down the highway, but it was only coming from the giant snow mattress on top of the car in front of me.
Getting laid as fast as possible.
If you want some fast mattress you gotta use Tinder.
A Houstonian legend that won 75 million dollars from the Astros winning the World Series. Mattress Mack is a G.
Brayden: Hey did you hear that the Phillies fans were taunting the Houstonian legend, Mattress Mack?
Me: Yeah, I know. Don't mess with Mack!
An bountifully haired pubic region, usually on a female, with the appearance of a part stuffed mattress.
Uncommon due to the exponential growth of styled pubic depilation amongst the teen and twenty something demographic.
Wow look at that!!
Ya think it's a merkin?
Mebbe, but it is a she is a true Mattress Lap