dirty wipe

when the ratio of shitting to wiping is uneven due to a turd falling off untapered...causing heavy wiping.

It took me an hour to shit,and i still ended up with a dirty wipe.

12👍 5👎

Security Wipe

To wipe after an expected Shart, or to wipe feces out of but crack to prevent a skid mark.

"dude, i thought i sharted, but the Security Wipe came back negitive" "Dude, i had to do a security wipe on that one. Saved my drawers.

15👍 7👎

Dry Wipe

The most satisfying wipe job performed for rectal cleansing post defecation. To dry wipe, one pinches a clean turd and the subsequent wiping of the ass results in the toilet paper being clean and "dry" and free of any fecal remnants.

Roger was already running late for work but he felt the urge to take a dump before embarking upon his long commute to the office. Fortunately for Roger and his high fiber diet, he was able to pinch off a clean loaf and was able to dry wipe thus saving him valuable time.

10👍 4👎

Wet Wipe

The act of ejaculating into your hands after masturbating and then proceeding to wipe your face in a forgetful manner. Resulting in your own ejaculation being smeared on your own face.

Boy: Awww that was a good wank...... OH SHIT I JUST WET WIPED MYSELF!

14👍 6👎

wipe down

When one smokes an already bought bag of marijuana of another person and does not have to pay for what he/she smoked.

give me a wipe down dude im fuckin broke

35👍 25👎

phantom wipe

When after you take a dump, you wipe your ass but see nothing on the toilet paper.

I just took a shit and did a phantom wipe.

36👍 23👎

glass wipe

one who wipes glass (before serving drinks); a bartender

"Hey glass wipe, can I get some service down here?!"

16👍 8👎