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Cunt Wank

Having sex with someone you find repellent just to give your wrist a break

What the hell Phil, I can't believe you went home with that heffer last night!

Fuck it mate, it was just a cunt wank after all.

by RathanD July 11, 2008


Amish Wank

The act of masterbating without using any form of technology what so ever.

My internet was down so I had to have an amish wank last night.

by lord of the snearch August 11, 2010

13๐Ÿ‘ 1๐Ÿ‘Ž


Cheeky Wank

British slang for jerking off (aka squeezing the snake).

She did not want to have sex, instead she sent me out for a cheeky wank.

by Big Sexy 4 March 4, 2010

43๐Ÿ‘ 3๐Ÿ‘Ž


social wanking

Pleasuring yourself to people you have added as friends or friends of friends on social networking sites.

Dude, I haven't been able to leave my house for days because of the pics people have posted of the bikini party and I have been social wanking all day.

by Satthew Manders October 29, 2009

40๐Ÿ‘ 3๐Ÿ‘Ž


Cry wank

The ultimate display of self love/loathing, rubbing one out while weeping, superceded only by the ultimate cry wank, involving weeping while wanking, witha cigarette hanging from the mouth and a beer in your free hand.

I was so sad last night all I could do was cry wank.

by Mr C. Wanksalot June 22, 2005

355๐Ÿ‘ 52๐Ÿ‘Ž


Freedom Wank

The first wank after a long exam season. Involves screaming, "FREEDOM!" enthusiastically at the point of ejaculation.

Saul: Mate, I just had an incredible Freedom Wank.
Tom: Oh yeah I heard! I thought you were watching Braveheart.

by TomAndSaul June 5, 2014


A Bit Of A Wank On

A phrase that describes when an object is shaking or vibrating in an abnormal or particularly violent fashion.

"Y'see these ceiling fans, Barry?", Joshua McTrousers called to his workmate. One fan wasn't secured properly and was shaking side to side whilst spinning. "Yes, the middle one has got a bit of a wank on, hasn't it", Barry concurred. Joshua tightened his grip on his tool case. "I'll have this fixed by the day's end, or my name isn't Joshua McTrousers!"

Alice's car had a bit of a wank on, as her complete lack of practical skill had led her to think that the best replacement for a flat tire was a square one.

"Controlling resonance in mechanical systems is a challenge for designers", Professor Gardenhose explained. "If you don't control it properly, your resultant engine might run with a bit of a wank on."

by JankZappa January 19, 2022