New Year's Absolution

Easily described as the feelings of relief and consolation that you feel when you find out that all your friends gave up their New Year's Resolution(s) too.

Person 1: 'Aren't you supposed to be at the gym?'

Person 2: 'Hey well Frank went out to the bar yesterday!'

Person 1: 'Oh, thank god, it's New Year's Absolution.'

Person 1: Sighs and light's a cigarette.

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what in the absolute fuck

The most extreme variant of what the fuck. Considered to be one step above what in the actual fuck.

"Hey Tom, we're gonna need you to come in this weekend." "Really?" "Yeah. Also, the client moved the deadline from next month, to next Thursday..." "Okay...What in the absolute fuck?"

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absolute donkey

someone who is an absolute monster at what they do, typically a sport. a large person, very muscular, and all around a large person...

Rey Lewis is an absolute donkey bro

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Doing the absolute most

Putting immense effort and class into a role or song or being not afraid of going out of your comfort zone with a character.

E.g. You are doing the absolute most in every role and this is why you get every role you audition for. We Stan this (this is a positive thing)

absolute work of art

first of all you look like you're staring into somebody's soul, the mans on the left.. he somebody's dad for sure. 40 year old man loooks part demon too.. Grab the belt john he boutta whoop some child’s ass. bro the guy on the top left definitely got his haircut at grandmas house I think she forgot he’s a dude. and simon.. if this picture was among us.. you are def the imposterr... looking like you're about to go stab someone 100 times in their slump.. hella sus... thats why im scared bruh

damn bro did you hear about how ayla made that absolute work of art?

Absolute Beta Male

Someone that all the girls feel comforable talking to because they are undeniably and permenently destined for the friend zone.

See also: Beta Soy Boy

Friend 1:All the girls only want to talk to me
Friend 2:Thats because you're an Absolute Beta Male destined for the Friend Zone.

absolute knickers lah

when something is simply shambolic/rubbish. the 'lah' is to be emphasised heavily.

Simply calling something 'knickers' does not suffice...

This division 3 football match is absolute knickers lah

Was out at a nightclub last night, had to go on the beer cos it was absolute knickers lah

That essay of mine took me ages, its absolute knickers lah