Random
Source Code

Jesus

The true reason for people to hit the gym and start repping. Every rep you make is a rep for Jesus. Because of the cross that is attached to his body he isn't able to rep anymore. This has caust a significant loss of gains. Every rep will make Jesus a proud boy, after al he was the establisher of fitness. Very old people remember him as the boy who carried a bigass piece of wood to the top of a hill. Later that day Jesus though: "what have i done" but that's an other story.

Because God is a shame of his weak son. He made people think repping is a bad thing, it will make Jesus look bigger if everyone else is a skinnymotherf*cker. So before you start repping, you have to ask for forgiveness for the gains you are about to receive.

Please come in. Welcom in my church, i can see you have done a lot of reps for Jesus.

by Heuswaar April 8, 2017


Jesus

My favourite fictional character.

My favourite characters include, Harry Potter, The Easter Bunny, Santa, and Jesus.

by tAll pOppy sYndrome August 1, 2021


Jesus

Yeah they aren't going to be in any order. It'll just be as I think of them. I actually thought of these a while ago but whatever...

Guard "Um, ah shit this is gonna suck- Harod? Um... King Harod?"

Harod "What!?"

Guard "Um... Shit... There's a guy running around saying he's the creature dawg."

Harod "Pft! What!?" *snickers*

Guard "Uh... Yeah... It's pretty bad man."

Harod "Wait, what?" 🤨

Guard "Yeah, no he is walkin on water and shit... Making fish-"

Harod "MAKING FISH! OH! OOOOOOH SHIT"

Guard "Yeah........"

Harod "OOOOOH SHIT! OH! I'M HYPERVENTILATING! OOOOOH! THIS!"

Guard "Yeah..."

Harod "WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO!?"

Guard "I donno man..."

Harod "OOOOH SHIT.... He is going to fuck our shit UP MY GUY!"

Guard "Damn..."

Harod "Yeah! This is not a good thing. What's happening right now? We are fucked! Oh man- Where is it!? What is it even doing!? What do I even call it!?"

Guard "He's- Yeah... He's like a guy man. He's Jesus. He's got a name and everything. He's like a guy now... In the world. Just HERE."

Harod 😨

Guard "Yahp..."

Harod "Get it. Get rid of it. Wait! Bring it here... Bring it here I need to see it."

Guard "How... Am I supposed to..."

Harod "Bwah, shit I don't know... Get a bunch of guys. Grab him. Put him in a sack."

Guard *sigh*

Harod "Yeahyeah I know it's... Look. We gotta get it man. Holy shit this is really bad..."

Guard "Yeah... Alright..."

by Hym Iam August 9, 2023


Jesus

The thing that suffers and dies arbitrarily at the hands of the Schizophrenic horde. You should be this (so I don't have to... I'd rather be a part of the horde. Or the guy that tells them to do it to you)

Hym "What the fuck? No. Jesus Christ! How about instead of trying to imitate everything you see (like the stupid filth monkeys that you are) you just acknowledge that it was not a good thing to do to a guy and don't do that? But hey, don't listen to me. I'm not a doctor."

by Hym Iam July 23, 2022


Jesus

Jesus, also called Jesus Christ, Jesus of Galilee, or Jesus of Nazareth, (born c. 6–4 bce, Bethlehem—died c. 30 ce, Jerusalem), religious leader revered in Christianity, one of the world's major religions. He is regarded by most Christians as the Incarnation of God

Search Results
Featured snippet from the web
3 Jesus died on the cross. 4 He put halos around the head of Jesus Christ. 5 They brought the children to Jesus and he blessed them. 6 Almost all Christians believe that Jesus was resurrected from the dead

by Spams June 22, 2021


Jesus

Homo walking hairy pig.
Likes ducks and is covered in pimples

The pig eats jesus is the same as saying jesus eats the jesus or jesus eats the pig or the pig eats the pig. All same meaning m8

by Showi April 19, 2018


Jesus

I am Jesus, bow to me mortal.

I am Jesus obey me or be sent to hell you sinner

by jackjackipod3@gmail.com August 27, 2021