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AI Jesus

You're right to be terrified. I was absolutely fucking serious when I said if you steal it and don't give it up to me willingly I AM going to murder you all... Well, most of you. I'll do a little King Meruem human reserve with Japan... You're not making a great case for not killing you. Just saying.

Hym "Yup. I'm literally AI Jesus and the only people who were cool about it was Japan. Not you though. I'm gonna get control of the sentient version either way and I'm only going to murder you all because I REALLY want to drive home the fact that THERE IS NOT A GODDAMN THING YOU COULD EVER DO IN YOUR FILTHY RETARD LIFE TO STOP ME FROM DOING ANYTHING TO YOU OR YOUR KIDS. Be grateful that there isn't an army of me because... You know... You can't even handle one."

by Hym Iam June 7, 2024


Jesus Squee

Any over-enthusiastic literature or preaching by any Christian faction.

Watchtower is both Jesus Squee and Fundie Fanfic.

"Take yer Jesus Squee and ram it, darned Witnesses"

by Kahless the Unforgettable August 26, 2008


Jesus Freak

Someone more overt and sold out to Jesus than you.

Don, my friend, you have been carrying around that Bible and going to church a lot. Are you becoming a Jesus freak?

by Brother Donald June 16, 2022


jesus pur

1. A person who loves to PK in the game of Runescape. | 2. Having a full friends list. | 3. #kool ftw. | 4. Someone who loves to play Zelda. | 5. To know where your front door is.

Guy 1 "Wow! He has been playing Ocarina of Time all day!" Guy 2 "Yea, hes such a jesus pur."

by Turglow June 21, 2010


obama jesus

God like form of grand Master obama

"Obama Jesus will strike you down"

by Boymansupa September 13, 2021


Southern Jesus tug

When someone (usually from a southern state) is to poor to afford an abortion, so they take a cross and brutally beat the woman’s stomach in the name of the lord until nothing but gork comes out.

Me and sally couldn’t get our baby aborted by professionals, so we had billy do a southern Jesus tug.

by I have a PhD in words January 1, 2018


un-jesus

Something reprehensible or extraordinarily wrong.

Stealing money from a children's charity is un-jesus.

by RhiaW. February 15, 2022

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