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Jesus Juice

Midwest slang for orange juice containing the drug propylhexedrine aka Benzedrex. The drug can be bought over the counter in the form of a nasal inhaler normally used for allergies. If you break the inhaler and take out the cotton inside and soak it in orange juice or any acidic beverage for 24 hours the active ingredient (propyl) is extracted. Propyl has similar effects to amphetamine and methamphetamine and induces a state of intense focus and euphoria. It is also horrible for your vascular system and causes severe vasoconstriction.

In simple terms you will go sicko mode and probably will end up on meth if you weren’t already when you took the Jesus Juice. It’s called Jesus Juice because it makes you feel like Jesus and it will bring you back from the dead.

Me: Hey bro do you want some speed laced orange juice?

Homie: Oh, shit did you put your Vyvanse into OJ?

Me: Nah I ran out like a week ago, this is Jesus Juice! It feels just as good if not better. You can feel your brain cells dying so it must be good.

by danasp_42 December 27, 2019


Jesus time

When you declare Jesus time there is no cussing and no shenanigans .

Guy 1: That little mother fuc...
Guy 2: It’s Jesus time.
Guy 1: Ok.

by Hamburgerblobfish May 10, 2019


Jesus time

The timer between A.D and B.C

It’s Jesus time.

by The garbage can 69 April 20, 2021


jesus-legal

another way of saying you are 33 years old

It was Dans' birthday yesterday, he is now Jesus-legal

by Entity1002 March 1, 2022


jetway jesus

The act of a person using a wheelchair to obtain early boarding on a (usually) Southwest Airlines flight, only to miraculously be cured and not require the wheelchair to deplane at the destination. The scourge of passengers who follow the rules because those passengers board first and take up the prime front seats. Quite common on flights to Florida.

We had eight Jetway Jesus passengers on our flight.

by Iureport March 27, 2024


Jetway Jesus

A term that no one uses and one guy decided to come up with as away of spreading ableist ignorance.

Ignorance about mobility aids use are the reason people give ambulatory wheelchair users attitude, harass them, and interrogate them. The majority of wheelchair users are ambulatory wheelchair users; meaning they are able to walk or stand for certain short amounts of time. The process of standing in line to check your baggage, then walking to TSA, then standing in line to go through TSA, and then walking to your terminal (this doesn’t even account for if you need food) can either be entirely too much for a person with a disability or chronic illness, or exasperate their pain to the extreme. That entire process should also, not be compared to the less than 50 feet it takes to walk to your wheelchair.

Some guy on Urban Dictionary: Wow, look at those people walk off the plane to their wheelchairs! Jetway Jesus must have healed them.

Me: You don’t need to be paralyzed to need a wheelchair. Most wheelchair users can walk some distance. 😑

by klavuu01 August 15, 2024

33👍 20👎


Jetway Jesus

A mythical figure colloquially known in the airline industry believed to miraculously 'heal' passengers who request wheelchairs or any other form of mobility assistance at their point of departure but mysteriously no longer need it upon their arrival. The sudden recovery is often attributed to the miraculous intervention of 'Jetway Jesus'. The term reflects the cynical humor often employed by airline employees due to the perceived misuse of accessibility services by able-bodied passengers.

After helping a passenger in a wheelchair onto the plane, I was surprised to see her walk off unassisted at the destination. Looks like we've had another visit from Jetway Jesus.

by HappyCleaner82 November 22, 2023