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A hurt bagel is an adjective used for a person who is violently high. Usually when a person consumes high amounts of THC they may experience symptoms such as couch lock, spacing out, an inability to form coherent sentences etc. Such symptoms indicate that the victim of THC's wrath has become a hurt bagel.
Steve: "Yo look at John over there, he's so blasted! He hasn't said a word in the past hour and he's been staring at that lamp for at least thirty minutes!"
Mark: "Yeah dude he's way too ripped. He's just a hurt bagel right now."
a bagel in which the condiments have been replace with man juice contrast to the usual butter or cream cheese
The customer was acting rather snobbish so the cook gave him a nice warm giz bagel
A sexy twink who speaks in cursive
OH MY GOD DIME YOU ARE SUCH A COREY THE BAGEL.
A term for an African woman's asshole.
Guy 1: Hey, should I ask out Adebowale? Guy: Totally man, I heard she's got a great Nigerian Bagel.
a bagel in desperate need of toasting, without which it is impotent in terms of it's edibility and taste factor.
this impotent bagel does nothing for me
To really freak out over something. See flip a shit, flip a biscuit
1: Way to flip a bagel there.
2: Ben really flipped a bagel when I drank the last mountain dew.
3: Hey! Don't flip a bagel over this, but (insert reason to flip a bagel here)
Titties that look like actual BAGELS
Guy: man those tiddies look like bagels
Other guy: Those are some bagel titties