Rule 7443

If you misunderstand something you are instantly an idiot moron bitch

Person 1: fuck i misunderstood something
Person 2: Rule 7443 moron

Union rules

Wha... What do you mean "actors can't actually have sex when they film sex scenes!?" She should be able to consent to whoever she wants whenever she wants! What next!? Are you going to try to stop the female employees of group homes for the developmentally disabled from fucking the clients!? THIS IS AN OUTRAGE!!!

Hym 😨 "Union rules!? You mean... I've been masterbating to FAKE SEX SCENES!? UERGH! UUUUGH!! 🤢 Why would you do that!? OOOHOHOHOHO!!! YOU GUYS ARE IN FOR IT NOW! I've been defrauded! I... I'm... I'm suing everybody for this! You bastards are going to pay for every wasted sperm! HHUEEGH! 🤢 Ugh! I'm suing everybody! I'm suing Ann Hathaway and Jake Gyllenhaal for that bullshit pill movie! I'm suing Brad Pitt and Angela Jolie for that spy movie! Everyone's getting it! You SICK bastards! FUCK! 🥺 I FUCKING HATE YOU GUYS..."

argument rule

after arguing you guys fuck it out

we finished arguing so we had to do the argument rule.

rule 964

If you let someone borrow your hot glue gun, they HAVE to send you a full on tittie pic.

Hey, I let you borrow my hot glue gun! Rule 964!

rule 964

If you let someone borrow your hot glue gun, they HAVE to send you a full on tittie pic in return.

I let you borrow my hot glue gun. Rule 964

Rule #1 of the Universe

Max CANNOT say "no you" to James.

In any instance where James is complimenting Max, they cannot return the compliment with a "no u", uno reverse card or any other form of complimet reflection.
*also Max is valid and perfect*

James: "Ur great Max"
Max: "No u"
James: "No u"
Max: "You can't say that"
James: "Actually you can't according to Rule #1 of the Universe"

Creep Rule

The creep rule is used to make sure sure you don't date someone who is too far below your age. The creep rule is simple. In order to calculate how far below your age you can date you need to use the following method. Take your age, divide it by 2 and then add 7.

Eg. If you are 24 divide your age by 2 (which is 12) then add 7 (which makes 19), If you are 24 then you can date someone who is the minimum age of 19. If you date someone younger than that YOU'RE A CREEP, hence the name "Creep Rule." In order for this formula to work, you must calculate it using the age of the person who is older in the scenario.

Dude, you're 45 and dating a 20 year-old? You're a creep!!!! Creep rule is half-your age + 7. You should date my cousin instead, she's 30.