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dealt a beadle

Dealt a bad hand in life. Unlucky. Originating from the famous late British television comedian Jeremy Beadle who was born with a small, deformed hand.

Jeez mate, this just aint right. I got ADHD, bipolar and a personality disorder. I've been dealt a beadle.

by Loopydave May 2, 2018


Beadle Nap

A nap when one almost becomes comatose. Can fall asleep under any circumstances for a long period of time, to wake up highly disorientated, forgetting that they've been asleep and requesting "a map of august". The best form of napping, a completely chilled experience. Some have been known whilst in this state to spill a beer all over themselves, and still fail to wake up when vanish is sprayed all over them.

you just had a nap" "no i didn't".. "classic beadle nap

by lovebeadlenapping April 25, 2011


Beadle Punch

A weak right-handed punch given to someone as a form of ridicule. The Beadle Punch is achieved by shaping your hand into a beadle claw, and then used against your opponent in a fast, repetitive manner.

Guy 1 "Did you spill my pint?"

Guy 2 "Yes I did"

Guy 1 "I owe you a Beadle Punch for that you t*@Β£!"

Guy 2 "Noooo... Not the dreaded Beadle Punch!!!"

by DJ Nibbles November 26, 2006

9πŸ‘ 3πŸ‘Ž


Jeremy Beadle

1) A TV host that annoyed the public with various "comedy" set ups and who also made a small fortune from showing clips of people falling over and hurting themselves. He has a small hand - a deformation from God to remind us all that we shouldn't profit from others misfortune.

2) When you have been dealt a Jeremy Beadle in a card game you have been dealt a bad hand. See above.

A traumatised wannabe terrorist has been told to prove his faith by shooting his grandmother in the face and is now standing over the body with a smoking gun in his hand...

Jeremy Beadle jumps out from a bin, dressed as a terrorist:
"Ha ha..Got you..it was a fake gun there Tommy, it was a set up"
Tommy: "Shit, I used my own gun. I killed my grandmother for nothing..."
Jeremy Beadle: "My hand hurts.."

by Digitalnonsense November 12, 2006

29πŸ‘ 17πŸ‘Ž


double beadle

The act of fisting either anal or vaginal by someone with both hands and the fister has small hands.

Named after British celebrity Jeremy Beadle

Terri: "Sam why are you walking funny today?"

Sam: "Gary gave me a double beadle last night, it was amazeballs.
Terri: "The guy with the tiny hands?"

by Craggnarr March 20, 2017


seb beadle

slang for a β€œposh twat” or rather someone who votes conservative (a tory)

me: hello old chum

y/n: oh you’re such a seb beadle

by hungry_mama_2k20 October 30, 2020


jeremy beadle

Jowly Star of Just for Laughs and Beadle's About. Also known as a "star" attraction at various circuses, possibly holding the chimps while Mary Chipperfield gives them a slap.

Interestingly, Jeremy was bitten by a rabid pig as a child and now one of his hands is turning into a trotter and he sometimes grunts like a rutting pig.

by Ian Rogers March 26, 2004

19πŸ‘ 12πŸ‘Ž