Garfield

A woman's full lower package

Ey Christian did you see Selena's garfield at monte carlo?

3👍 2👎

Garfield

1. a fatass cat, with orange fur

2. a president that has orange fur

garfield gave jon a BJ

garfield gave congress a BJ

10👍 15👎

Garfield

A sexual act involving shoving uncooked lasagna up someone's anus and waiting for it to melt inside, after which a man has anal sex with the one with lasagna in their anus. When the man nuts, the mixture seeps out and is basically a salty lasagna.

Jhon: Hey Dave, I heard you Garfielded Heather last night.

Dave: Yeah, doing the Garfield gets get to come every time.

2👍 3👎

Garfield

the most retarded and un-funny comic in exsistance that somehow grosses ~1billion dollars a year on stupid consumers

Garfield: DERP HERP DERP
Audience: hahaha lets spend money

12👍 28👎

Garfield

When a ginger shaves his pubes and doesnt brush them off and gets a blowjob from a girl therefore leaving hair in her mouth which she then chokes on and coughs up a "hair ball"

"Dude, I heard you hooked up with a fatty last night?"

"Haha yeah, I gave her the Garfield!"

3👍 8👎

Garfield

A pinnacle of virtue and masculinity, equipped with godlike physical strength, an unbeatable penchant for one-liners and more skills and talents than an orange, striped Swiss army knife on steroids. His many deeds are recounted in the works of the scribe Shakespeare Hemingway.

"Why have you not invited Garfield? Do you fear to face real man?" asked Queen Elizabeth II to Prince William with challenge.

4👍 24👎

garfieldism

A religion that was inadvertently created by Garfield that promotes doing nothing all day.

He won't get off the couch because he is a follower of garfieldism.

27👍 2👎