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A stalker of small children.
A pervert of the kids.
A slave Driver of the elves.
A thief of the cookies.
A legal immigrant to the world.
A rebel without a cause.
Have you ever wonder what happens to children that wake up to find him?
He rapes them then bashes there heads again the chimney.
He watches you, Everywhere.
Him and God are bother helpless stalkers.
What do we do to this flying, fat, red blob of jolly madness?
I say we touch his jolly ass.
He's obviously a terrorist.
He isolates his workers so no one from our outside world could know,
That Santa has a thing for the butt.
Unscramble Santa.
And you get Satan.
Santa is the Devil.
Santa toke over Jesus Christs Birthday.
It's cause Santa is Satan.
He even wears Satan's theme color.
Red.
Also the color of Blood.
Scared Yet?
You should Be.
Santa Clause:: Ho Ho Ho, Merry Christmas!
Kid:: I want a hot wheels toy set!
Santa:: I want to show you the toys in my master bedroom that has padlocks on the doors
Kid:: Yaaay!
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The clauses which detail Kris Kringle under the North Pole Act of 1436.
Clause 1, Subsection A states that: Saint Nicholas must manufacture a wide variety of games, tools, and miscellaneous objects for children under the age of 12 in all countries of the world.
Clause 1, Subsection B states that: Saint Nicholas must do so for eternity, without pay, and must aquire the following traits: Obesity, A long white beard, a red suit, a fondness for burnt cookies and warm milk.
Evil Little Boy: "Where are my presents?"
Mom: "You were naughty this year, so Santa didn't bring you any."
Evil Little Boy: "Na-uh! According to Clause 1, Subsection A and B, of the Santa Clauses, Santa is required to bring me my demanded presents!"
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A pedophile who visits children on Christmas
Child: Mommy Santa Clause visited me last night. Mom: What did he bring you? Child: He called it a hand job!
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When a Male/Female Finger another woman or beats off a man and gets skeeted on their hand. They then apply skeet to partners chin and/or cheeks. Usually done when not wanting to see this person again.
Kyle Derosiers
Stephanie Cumbed on my hand so I santa claused her and she never did it again.
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Clones of Saint Nicholas who run the streets of many big citys. Recently found to belong to a secretive cocaine operation gang. It is also possible to find them in department stores. They consist of men who have little or no money.
Dude that santa clause is packin some serious shit
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When you have a shit and you don't want to go to the bathroom so you slide that shit up and down your asshole.
I've been Santa Clausing since the first act.
A fat harry man that breaks into your house on christmas night. Drinks the sticky white stuff the fourteen year old leaves out in the fridge. Rapes you under the bed then gives you a sededation and puts you back to sleep, then he has an affair with your mother. Finally, he is every boys idol because he knows where all the naughty girls live.
Me: Jackson us such a Santa Clause.