hubble telescope

An unusally large aperatus for the project at hand. Generally used in the medical and/or scientific fields, though not always. Refers to the famous space telescope that allows Earth scientists to see the farthest reaches of this galaxy and others.

Is more and more used to describe unusally large objects in general.

Event: Kelly sees Jon using a arch welder to light his cigarette.

Kelly says, "Look at Jon using the hubble telescope over there"

Event: Sam was in need of a biopsy and the instrument the doctor used was very big.

Sam says, "I don't know why you need the hubble telescope to see it"

Event: Tara noticed that Larry had very large hands.

Tara says, "Best be keeping your hubble telescopes away from me"

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Indiana telescope

Taking a nice long turd in the eye for sexual gratification

Mike Pence got pink eye when Mother gave him the old Indiana telescope.

asian telescope

To spread someone's asscheeks and take a peek into their asshole.

dude i totally asian telescoped this girl last night

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telescopic umbrella

It was used in the Peter Gabriel song, Modern Love and is another name for a dick or a boner.

Peter: I fly off to Rome to my prima bella. She leaves me in the rain with telescopic umbrella.

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Hubble Space Telescope

What is the Hubble Space Telescope? Well, I looked it up on Wikipedia and it gives you an overview of Hubble’s life. They say “Hubble was launched in 1990” and “it can take extremely high resolution images.” Huh. They didn’t let me edit the Wikipedia page, so here we are. Let me tell you, Hubble is so much more than anything that some researcher can write on a page. Let’s start with the basics: it’s a very big peepee in space. If that’s not enough for you, consider the fact that the Hubble Space Telescope is indisputably the thiccest satellite so far. 24 THOUSAND POUNDS OF HUBBLE. It’s so beautiful I could cry. And not only that, it’s speeding along at OVER FIVE MILES PER SECOND. That’s right people, miles per second. That’s faster that an ambulance. Now, I know this definition isn’t supposed to be that long. I also know that this probably won’t get published. But I had to try. I had to write about Hubble. I love you Hubble. Always.

“Hey what’s the coolest thing in the world?”
“Haha, the Hubble Space Telescope, of course!”

nubble space telescope

having an internet connection so slow that u transmit and receive data as fast as the hubble space telescope.

he's lagging so badly he could be a nubble space telescope

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telescope fish day

March 8th is the official day to celebrate the glory that is the deep sea telescope fish.

“Hey Jim, did you know that tomorrow is telescope fish day?”

“What it is?! I’m SO EXCITED!”