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Random
1. a timely last-possible-moment off-tone verbal bomb thrown usually during an intelligent discussion that ends expectedly
2. a below-the-belt punch thrown in a long fight milliseconds before being separated.
jasper (as he awaited the 'turn off electronic devices' announcement, having an argument with his wife from his tracked cellular device) - "listen, i understand everything you're saying and I certainly entrust that you mean well, but diet coke is not a healthy drink and you should not be feeding it to our four month old...
...i have done the research woman!
...your breast milk is NOT gross!
...do you think i want to be talking about this while people look at me? i should be at peace right now and getting 'have a good flight' wishes from you, but this is an important matter and i just found out you've been doing this since he was born! listen, i gotta go, the flight attendant is here."
flight attendant (walking down the isle looking left and right -"sir turn your phone off NAOW!"
jasper (gesturing to flip his phone closed) - "listen i gotta go..."
flight attendant - "sir!"
wife (in ill fashioned tone) - "you certainly do Bob. have fun."
jasper (in his mind, as he flips his cell closed while staring somewhere between the nozzle blower and outside) - "this fucking cunt has perfect timing for exit grenades. fuck her! and fuck tsa! alright, get it together jasper; you're not that kind of man."
feces, shit, crap, turd, dung...whatever else you would like to refer it as.
"I just about blew the toilet up when I tried to flush that rectal grenade."
"If you don't shut the hell up, I'm going to hold you down and drop a rectal grenade in your mouth!"
"I just had the biggest rectal grenade come out...now my butt hurts"
When you eat something that you know is gonna fuck your stomach up later, particularly really spicy food.
Randy: damn man, I just polished off a pile of the hottest chicken wings they got!
Brian Cropp: sounds like you just pulled the pin on a genuine ass grenade!!!
AIDS Grenade (noun): When you start hanging out with a chick who has AIDS, just so that everyone will think you close, and then when your enemies come out of the woodwork to bang her, they get AIDS.
Dude: 'Does Jim really bang that junkie chick who's always hanging around?'
Bro: 'Naw, she's an AIDS Grenade.'
A thing that you call a person that is not cussing and is fun to say
You are a turd grenade!
A statement of fact, usually in the form of an e-mail, that renders all hostile (emailers) silent
Employee #1: I had been getting calls and e-mails all morning about the Widget Project. Managers want status, test group wants results.
Employee #2: What changed? Why did they stop?
Employee #1: I silenced them all when I explained to them the Widget Project was, in fact, not my project (according to my manager) and they need to direct their efforts towards <Employee X>
Employee #2: Sounds like you lobbed them a logic grenade
The Chinese grenade is a sex move where the male waits till at climax then will run out and charge in while cumming to try in blow it into her face it gets the Chinese part for it's tendency to malfunction
Jimmy tried to Chinese grenade but it malfunctioned and he smacked this balls in his wife's face