blow job

When a girl rams a man's cock deep down her throat and gags on it until he cums. When a woman is happily able to suck on his dick, stroking it, making his orgasm reach its point. This action pleases a man very highly and he enjoys it very much so. If you want to set him off, swallow.

"Aw fuck yeah you dirty cunt, you give great blow jobs!"

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swedish rim job

gay guy licks in the inner circle around an uncircumcised dick.

Could you please quit snoodling with me and just give me a swedish rim job!

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crazy nut job

typically a bitch who "thinks" she's right, when she's no where's close and sticking to her guns, even though she's as far off base as fucking possible, therefore making her a crazy nut job.

Andy: hey man, whats up with her thinking she's all that?
Todd: I dunno bro
Andy: Must be yet another crazy nut job. Does she have a sponsor?
Todd: Yea, bitches be crazy society

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get a job lil nigga

A phrase commonly said in Instagram comments in reels made by kids.

kid: *posts a reel on Instagram*

big nigga: get a job lil nigga

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Steak and a Blow Job Day

The male version of Valentine's Day. Per the holiday's official website at steakandbj.org, if the guy takes care of his girl on Valentine's Day, then she makes him feel special a month later on March 14 by giving him the 2 things that men love: steak and a blowjob.

Tom: What did you do on March 14?

Bob: Susan made me a steak and then gave me an amazing blowjob.

Tom: Why?

Bob: Because I spoiled her with flowers and a nice dinner on Valentine's Day, and March 14 is Steak and a Blow Job Day.

Tom: Damn. I shouldn't have ignored my girl on Valentine's Day.

Bob: True! Hey, I posted some pics on the official Steak and BJ Day Facebook page. Go see facebook.com/steakandbj

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who the hell is steve jobs

ligma balls

man 1: It's so sad that steve jobs died of ligma
man 2: Who the hell is steve jobs?

Man 1: Ligma balls
Man 2 fucking dies

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you had one job

Response to failing to do the one and only thing you had to do. This is told, either in a disgusted, mocking, or angry tone to people, animals, inanimate objects, and anything else that fails to complete the simple task for which it was designed.
A way to express total fail, epic fail, especially when the one job was very simple.

To a cheap park bench that broke while I was sitting on it, "You had one job, park bench!"
To an accountant who was fired for inaccurate computing of business records. "You are supposed to be an accountant, right? You had one job, Sandy."
To a friend about my broken down car, "Damnit, it had one job!"

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