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Covid Hostage

When a country’s “zero Covid” policy leads to more restrictions and bans on both locals and aliens, often creating irrational fear and panic buying among them due to a shortage of fresh produce in wet markets and of basic essentials in supermarkets, including the closure of religious sites and hair salons nationwide.

How long more would Communist China hold the people in Hong Kong under Covid hostage?

by MathPlus February 9, 2022

13👍 36👎


Covid Craze

When someone has had enough of Coronavirus and wants to get out of quarantine asap. They usually go in a Covid Craze when they are bored or haven’t gone outside for ages.

“Did you see Jennifer’s Whatsapp status?! I think she’s having a Covid Craze

by ughhlivv April 11, 2020


Covid-☯️

When superstitious folks are gullibly led to believe that applying feng shui principles at the entrance of their house or office building would ward off the coronavirus or its deadlier variants—when the yin or negative energies of the pandemic outside would be neutralized by the yang or positive energies inside.

Thanks to Covid-☯️, a number of feng shui masters saw a golden opportunity to prey on the superstitious or frightened folks to grow their paranormal businesses.

by Covido September 20, 2021


Covid-10

The 10lbs in weight we're all gaining from comfort-eating and comfort-drinking.

On a Zoom call to Mark, Anthea quickly realised he was experiencing Covid-10 as his cheeks were bloated, and his chin had virtually doubled.

Junior had to ask Dad to stop eating all the tubs of ice cream on a daily basis, or he would become very chubby and catch a mild form of Covid-10.

by Sonny Saint April 29, 2020


Covid Year

A Covid year is a year that is marked by extreme time dilations where time seems to go by much slower due to tedious chaos and the inability to socialize in person.

Me: So I got together with by brothers last night. We had a nice time going out to dinner.
Them: Its been a while - a covid year to be exact.

by Siouxsie Supertramp February 21, 2021


That's got COVID

When something tastes, smells or is just overall bad

Person 1: Ew, look at that!
Person 2: That's got COVID

by Twinseers March 24, 2021


COVID-Munging

This is a variant of munging in which the corpse to be munged is a victim of the coronavirus, who is acquired via a local nursing home. To ensure proper social distancing, the participating individual who loses the coin toss, rock-paper-scissors, or other contest of choice, pops an experimental dick-enlarging pill which extends the participant’s penile length to 6 feet, in addition to donning a face mask with a slit cut out in the middle in order to allow the expelled mung and corona juice mixture (hence “COVID-mung”) to enter the perpetrator’s orifice(s) in an internationally acceptable manner.

Zack: Hey Cody, you wanna head over to the old folk’s home?

Cody: Yea sure... Why? You volunteering or something?

Zack: No, I just have a real strong hankering to perform a COVID-Munging on one of the former residents. Since I haven’t been able to get any quarantine pussy, I figured this’d be the next best thing to give my dick a nice kickstart.
Cody: You’re sick. What the fuck is wrong with you?
(Cody leaves the room only to quickly return, walking past Zack with the car keys)
Cody: C’mon you sick bastard, let’s go. Some old woman named Ethyl that I used to help just died and the way she put her muffins in the oven always made me sweat a bit.

by jellypuddinginmyanus42069 July 6, 2020