Random
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Random
If you’re a Walter you’re probably pride yourself for raw dogging reality. You lack the knowledge to play beer pong or maintain a regular human conversation because you’re inevitably consumed by your alter ego and pride yourself on being straight edge. You’re probably a Walter if you have symbolic tattoos that contradict how realistically dull you are. You’re probably a Walter if they only exciting thing in your life is seeing how much you can bench every day but don’t bench them bitches because a Walter is a virgin.
“What you don’t know your own zodiac sign?
You’re such a Walter!”
Walter: “ play some technical death metal”
I don’t know what I’d do without you. You made me feel complete and I really hope you never leave. Things may get hard but I’ll always be by your side. You‘re the one I want in my life forever. I can’t wait for the day I see you and meet your family and you meet mine. I’m sorry if I ever get mad at you and I’m sorry if I make you upset at times
A. Walter I love you so much
Jeff Dunham's grumpy newscaster-puppet.
Lots of the folks who tune in to daily radio/TV news-broadcasts do so largely because they enjoy the pleasant/efficient manner of the announcer (think Lowell Thomas and Dallas Townsend), so I would wonder if Walter Crankyite would really get all that many people who would wanna listen to HIM read the latest headlines.
Walter Jr. is a Fatherless Person bc his dad left him bc he's gay
Wannabe Special Forces Soldier who can usually be recognised by 5 Signs
1) Looks like they’ve never seen a gym in there life
2) Watches Yellowstone relentlessly
3) Whole Section was KIA or “Lives out in the sticks”
4) Mentions Black Ops Missions that are “classified”
5) Runs a “Veteran Owned Business selling cheap chinese knock off knifes and gear endangering the lads/ladettes who use it”
Stuey “Whole Section was KIA told my Dad about it and he said that’s what happens bud”
Bob “Interesting where did your dad serve”
Stuey “Rhodesia Black Ops”
Bob “Bullshit Stuey you are a Walter Mitty and a fraud your business is fuarked and we chucked your missus on the spit”