Random
Source Code
Random
Fuck Norris. His movies suck ass. Always have, and always will. He is a washed up actor, and it's toture to have to hear those goddamn "random fact" jokes about him. THEY ARN'T FUCKING FUNNY!!! Bruce Lee could kick Norris' ass. Bruce Lee really was a mean s.o.b. Infact, Lee let Norris be in one of his movies...in which he kicked the shit outta him. I don't understand why all these fucking retards idolize shitty martial artists like Norris instead of actual badasses.
Norris Lover:"Chuck Norris has really been dead for 10 years now...he doesn't know it though, becuase the Grim reaper is too scared to tell him. LOLerz!!!"
Non-Norris Lover:"...I'm gonna stab you in the face with a soddering iron now..."
4835👍 234👎
The act of the Chuck Norris is as follows (only people who own a Total Gym should attempt this act, or serious injury could be incurred)
Just before ejaculation, rip your dick through the condom, cum on your foot, and roundhouse kick your bitch in the face. When she says "What the fuck?", say "Don't mess with Texas."
Last night your mom was gettin crazy so I chuck norrised her and she calmed down.
1159👍 51👎
After having sex with your girlfriend, roundhouse kick her in the face and get out.
My bitch used teeth, so i gave her a good ol' Chuck Norris
1195👍 54👎
not as cool as bruce willis, and never will be.
wow that sucks, its so chuck norris.
2518👍 125👎
No man can describe such a word. Some say that he is a devout christian. He lays in his bed at night and waits for Jesus to pray to him.
Jesus: Hey, umm, Chuck? May I call you Chuck?
Chuck Norris: What is it
Jesus: Hey, uh, can you, uh, please stop swimming on land, you're making me look bad. Sorry for the notice....
(Awkward Pause)
Jesus: NAW! Jus kidding man..... :(
1092👍 53👎
A martial artist who thinks he is the shit but got his ass kicked by Bruce Lee on several occasions. The again, he is still alive so I guess that has to count for something.
'Chuck norris aint got shit on my holmes Bruce Lee, sept for the whole 'life' thing'
4917👍 271👎