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a pornographic magazine used as an aid while "jackin' the beanstalk"
Willie's mom found a pump manual under his bed.
629👍 195👎
A short publication that would have saved you a lot of time if you bothered to read it. However, reading an instruction manual before attempting to assemble/use the product with which it came is a sure sign of mental and physical weakness.
Manuals come free with purchases of self-assembly furniture, electronic products, children’s toys and many, many other products.
Some of these products are so simple to use, (eg. A padlock) that a 55 page, multi-lingual, fully referenced brochure doesn’t really seem necessary
When writing an instruction manual, follow these simple rules and you can’t fail;
1. Make the pages from stiff, shiny paper so that it’ll only stay open at the right page with the help of a rock, a toolbox and a dining room table positioned on each corner.
2. Make an extensive ‘Contents Page’ using the smallest font available and ensuring that you number the chapters, sections and sub-sections. Do this even if you only have 3 pages.
3. If applicable, include an illustration of the parts the buyer SHOULD have received and make sure this includes a picture of the manual itself.
4. When you reach the English chapter, don’t be tempted to waste money on a translator, as you can simply guess most English words and make up the rest as you go along.
5. Be sure to include diagrammatical information where appropriate – get a four year old child to help you with the drawings.
6. Make the manual's cover attractive to women so that they can sit on their comfy sofas and shout directions at their husband/boyfriend when they are doing perfectly well with superior male intuition (and brute force)
The instruction manual was written in total gibberish.
The instruction manual's glossary section was extremely useful.
Jack: Would you like to learn how your phone works in Arabic?
Jill: Oh Yes Please!
Jack: Here you are, it starts on page 205.
30👍 7👎
A sneaky way of saying hand job.
RJ: "so what happened last night?"
Gina: "well, I don't really want to tell you.."
RJ: "c'mon! pants friendly kiss? manual labor??"
22👍 4👎
"I installed my new computer without reading the manual. Duh."
10👍 1👎
A highly effective disciplinary action performed by a pimp onto a ho. It involves the pimp using the back side of his hand to pimp slap a ho in the face. The corrective slap must be violent enough so it does not require an additional follow up slap.
The pimp's sudden and unexpected manual correction quickly ended the ho's aspirations of ever quitting the profession and going back to school.
10👍 1👎
Defined as ones ability to control his or her fingers on a mobile device keyboard. One who makes multiple typos is said to have poor manual textdarity.
Cal's texts are as hard to understand as when he's on the phone talkin to you. I used to think he was an illiterate, but maybe he has bad manual textdarity, from his arthrytis.
lack of an ABS system in the car calling for intense and often tiring pumping of the brake pedal to stop.
Jesus, i almost crashed yesterday cuz' of my shitbox's manual ABS