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81st Base -
You will need:-
10 cucumbers
10 fit girls
A bouncy castle
10 blindfolds
1 blind man (To stop him watching you and your ladies)
A can of whipped cream
A digital video recorder
A chicken sandwich
-All of the above are needed-
What you will need to do:-
Take the 10 girls onto the bouncy castle. Blind fold and undress them all and the position the blind man 2 feet away from the bouncy castle. Stick one cucumber up each of the girls vagina's. Get the blind man to count to three loudly and when he reaches three, any girls who don't like the feel of the cucumber must sit down. Take the remaining girls who are standing up and have sex with them on the bouncy castle, you may now remove the blind folds. After you are exhausted, sit down and make the girls who sat down make out with each other whilst you eat your sandwich. Once you finish your sandwich get the whole group together, excluding the other man and have sex for a whole week without stopping, pouring the whipped cream on the girls whilst filming it. Once you have done this you have reached 81st base.
Guy: 'Dude, I just reached 81st base!!'
Guy1: 'Seriously you must be a god!'
Guy: 'Yer, but my dick still hurts after the week of sex.'
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(adj. and adv.) Not right, not correct, impolite, rude, improper, treyf, crazy; not ready, not alert; in baseball and softball, not touching one of the bases and thus vulnerable to being tagged out.
"I don't like Hillary either, but his remarks about her were way off base."
"Joe was off base so he was easily tagged out."
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1st Base- French Kissing
2nd Base- Hand Job/Fingering
3rd Base- Oral Sex
4th Base- Sexual Intercourse
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When you are having sex with your partners entire extended family, covered in chocolate sauce and you simultaneously orgasm and LOSE THE GAME at the same time
Coincidentally YOU LOST
Kate: I totally got to 47th base last night
Matt &
Vonnie: You FUCK! I just lost five minutes ago!
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When she lets you put it in her pooper for the first time.
I finally made it to turd base last night.
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1st Base - Kissing, open mouth. Also any above the belt touching is included in this base.
2nd Base - Hands below the belt.
3rd Base - When mouths are used below the belt. This base also includes the sex toys.
Home Plate, (Home Run) - Intercourse
5th base or 'The Dugout' - Anal Sex.
A grand slam, would be achieving all of these on a first date.
First, Second, and Third are the typical sexual bases. Anything beyond those and you probably aren't using baseball metaphors any longer anyways!
(Unless of course referring to 'The Dugout', because that's just hilarious!)
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1st base is of course what everybody start's out with ..... It's just pretty much "Making out" Now making out is very passionite and everybody reading this I know enjoy's it (Unless you havn't gotton to 1st base yet but there is nothing wrong with that it's harder for some people to work up the courage to even ask somebody out) Now making out you want to start out slow nothing extremely serious so wait about 2 minute's to start getting really into it so when you really start getting into put some pressure on it push against each other's lips harder not to hard but hard enough to know that there is somebody there and now that you start doing that you might start to want more so maybe open your mouth a little bit (don't tounge yet) Open your mouth and actually feel them breathe dot that for a while and now that you have done that now it's time to start frenching (useing tounge) Move you tounge into there mouth not too far yet maybe too when you start feeling there teeth (But if you do this and they don't return the favor stop and wait till she/he is ready for that) But if they are then when you move your tounge out and move it back in go farther and the more you go just go farther not to choke them with your tounge but just let them know that you want it and you know as this progress's it will get more passionite and then you will have to wait and see what happen's ;) Oh and before I forget when you start to tounge you may have some saliva from both of you but just live thru it, it doesn't matter it's actually some what enjoyable
I got to 1st base with my girlfriend last night at the movie's
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