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Covid-22

Catch-22 during the coronavirus pandemic: if you stay at home, you have no money to feed your family and pay the bills; and if you go out and work, you risk your life and those of your loved ones, especially if some members are prone to contracting the virus due to a poor health condition.

Adios and his wife, both out of work, are in debt and face eviction at the end of the month, with the family of five trying to keep their baby who suffers from a rare disease condition that requires round-the-clock care at home instead of moving to a homeless shelter; however, if they go out to work, the odds of them infecting their little one are pretty high—they’re stuck in a Covid-22 situation.

by Covido December 1, 2020

20👍 40👎


COVID Head

COVID Head
The worst blowjob you will ever receive. Given during the quarantine of 2020 by a woman you met on tinder who had the corona virus prior to said blowjob and worse than actually catching the corona virus itself. It includes, but isn't limited to, teeth which tear up the penis as well being digitally penetrated by at least one finger and preempted with the promise of it being the best blowjob you'll ever receive.

Matt: Hey T-Bone what's up?
T-Bone: Dude don't even get me started man I got the covid head yesterday and couldn't even nut.
Matt: One finger or two?
TBone: One, what the Fuck?
Matt: That's why you gotta stick with the holla jobs.

by Ballzmahoney749 May 2, 2020

5👍 2👎


COVID virginity

Losing your COVID virginty after 14 months of no hookups.

"Oh damn bro, I lost my COVID virginity last night. I hooked with this fiiiine ass broad with big tits and a tight p****! HOOOOOWEEEEE!!!!"

by zodeep April 10, 2021

11👍 7👎


COVID-😷

When millions of women use the face mask as a substitute for no make-up days, and shy people use it to hide or retreat behind.

Not just to protect themselves against the coronavirus, for many in the workplace, the face mask is also used inexpensively to fight against COVID-😷, which saves them both time and money.

by Covido December 24, 2020

15👍 29👎


Covid-sexual

Noun/Adj. A person who takes covid precautions and rules too seriously and feeds into fear monger. These people usually wear face masks 24/7 in homes, cars, during sleep, stores and outdoors. In addition covid-sexuals will defend vaccines and the downfall of the economy by saying “this is a pandemic, we need to be courteous and safe!”. Many covid-sexuals are either “Karens” or self proclaimed “frontline workers” who work In a place that’s not open to the public and only work 8 hour shifts. You’ll find many covid-sexuals proclaim non unique and lack luster statements such as: “trump did a horrible job!” And “this is a pandemic! You need have a mask on 24/7”. They’ll usually spew their statements constantly on Twitter or in person. Usually not fun people to know or be around.

Person: *walking in large park with no mask*

Covid-sexual: “Excuse me, but don’t you know covid is a real pandemic? You need to have a mask on to protect everyone!? Don’t you care about human lives!?”

Person: “Covid is 95% survivable

Covid-sexual: “not according to NPR news! This is a real threat! You’re not even vaccinated! You’re breaking the federal mandate. I’m calling the police!!!”

by Violet_fennec May 17, 2021

7👍 5👎


COVID-🍦

When some mainland Chinese provinces are simplistically tempting vaccine skeptics or anti-vaxxers with buy-one-get-one-free ice cream cones if they get jabbed, as part of their carrot-and-stick strategy.

Is COVID-🍦just a quasi-ineffective primitive marketing gimmick to address vaccine hesitancy among some gullible residents?

by Covido April 11, 2021

14👍 28👎


Covid the 19th

A more respectable title Ms. Corona’s lawyers wanted WHO to use rather than Covid-19 in recognition of her lethal power in inflicting pain and suffering to millions of people globally, especially vis-à-vis those whom she felt gracious enough not to end their lives prematurely.

If the world continues to casually call her “Covid” or “Corona” instead of formally addressing her as “Covid the 19th,” Princess Corona threatens to mutate into the deadlier Covid-20, which could send most of the earthlings to the fearful side of eternity sooner than later.

by Covido December 18, 2020

16👍 32👎