Random
Source Code
Random
The effort colleges and universities put forth to convince their alumni to participate in their fund-raising schemes. Often, these letters will cite your success as evidence of their effectiveness. When this propaganda is presented in written form, it will include at least .5 exclamation marks per paragraph.
Some F. Schmuck has challenged <insert demographic here> to raise <insert amount here> by offering to match it if our goals are met! Your contribution will enable more students to have experiences just like yours and for us to continue our tax-payer and donor funded institutional masturbation.
When you're really horny and want to masturbate, but you have no fantasy, story and/or nobody to fantasize about. It is very frustrating and annoying, considering that your libido is good and you're in the mood, but you cannot do your thing only because you don't have a sexual fantasy in mind.
God I'm so horny, but I really have nothing to fantasize about. Even porn is not doing anything to me. How the hell can I get off?
Sounds like you have Masturbator's block. ;)
An arm injury in which a person with a small penis attempts to masturbate. Similar to tennis elbow, except with masturbation.
Josh tried to masturbate, but it was too small. He had to get a cast for his masturbator's wrist.
The act of being discovered while you are masturbating. This usually leads to pure humiliation, especially if the discoverer is a celebrity.
"Chase Rodrigue masturbated in his mom's truck when she went out to buy some groceries. However, our local weatherman caught him masturbating."
59👍 16👎
Disproportionate muscle growth in the arm used in masturbation, resulting in an "imbalance" of arm size.
Can be cured by using the weaker arm instead.
"Dude, check out my bicep! It's huge!"
"That's because you jerk with that one. Let's see the other one."
"I can lift a sofa with my masturbation arm. The other's just weak."
18👍 3👎
When a design professional produces a design that incites a "gasm," resulting in the enthusiastic exclamation of "Ah..." or a simliar sound.
Sergio practiced architectural masturbation when he designed a Gothic Cathedral and excalimed: "Mon-a-mii!!!"
29👍 8👎
the act of engaging in intelligent and interesting conversation purely for the enjoyment of your own greatness and individuality. Subjects range from obscure lp's to cultural movements in preindustrial societies. Either delivered through grand monlogues or subtle conversation orientation, it links large words and random references resulting in nothing acually being communicated.
Though the influence of Ric Okasisk was quite evident within Weezer's blue album, rivers coumo domination of the lyrical form seem quite evident in Pinkerton
448👍 176👎