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Very obese female sexual predators that seek out highly intoxicated men. Then lure them to a private area where they will force the man to inseminate them repeatedly.
Don’t get to drunk or you will end up taking the New Orleans swamp ride.
When you're eating her box and she vibrates a fart on your chin
"I was eating her pussy and she hit me with a New Mexico Squirrel Chirp."
What isn’t there to say about Long Beach?
Greatest city in the world if you ask anyone who lives there. Everyone grows up the same. The boys surf drink and smoke weed. The girls do exactly the same. Dads grow up to become fireman while moms become teachers. The Beach House is the new spot if your under 21, and the inn is the spot if your actually of age. Life’s a bagel has the best bagels but too bad it’s kosher. A coffee and a BEC are the only way to cure a hangover while lifeguarding the next morning. No need for a car when u have a bike and the greatest boardwalk in the world. That pretty much sums it up. Long Beach.
Let’s go out to the Long Beach, New York bars.
Long beach, New York? Every kid is a degenerate
When you shit and piss in a pregnant ladies mouth then proceed to suck it out
Hey babe, want a New Mexico hot pocket?
Semen that is produced from some guy jackin' off in New England
Elliot produced some New England Hand Chowder after seeing April in her bikini in the Cape on Sunday
In order to perform the New York Dirty Dog, one must be a cisgender male, heterosexual, and incredibly, incredibly courageous. If so, even then they must brace themselves for what is to come. To begin, you must travel to Times Square, New York. There you will find dozens of homeless people who are in need of money. Find one that is an uncircumcised male, and tell him you will give him 10,000 if you can suck his dick. He is NOT allowed to shower or clean himself in anyway beforehand. If he agrees, you must stay true to your word.
Joey dared me to give someone a New York Dirty Dog, and he’ll pay me 50K. It’s a 40K profit, totally worth it.
If you haven't seen part 1, go look at it it's on my profile. Anyways here's another around 1500 characters of my 5178 character fucking essay on how amazing New Jersey is because the definition character limit is 1500 characters. Here goes (i don't backtrack, this is all the writing that comes after the new york one, I don't backtrack not one bit.) - or "california is infiltrated by influencers who would wanna live there?" or "no one gives a shit about your state it's cold as fuck and the only thing good about you is seafood, plus you're fat because your weight is high because MASS-achusetts - Science Nerd 2763" or "new york is just a place to live with 10 roommates and ruin your life". We have the USA Ambassador to Burkina Faso and Benin, we have the guy who designed the MLB logo, we have Tom Cruise, we have Shaquille O' Neal, we were home to FUCKING THOMAS EDISON (hence the city, Edison), we have Richard Nixon, Queen Latifah, Paul Rudd, Grover Cleveland, Frank Sinatra, Martha Stewart, Brittany Murphy, Zach Braff, Thomas Mitchell, Michelle Rodriguez, Ray Liotta, John Amos, Dennis Boutsikaris, Benjamin Burnley, Lou Costello, Buzz Aldrin, Sean Baker, Judy Blume, MERYL FUCKING STREEP, Bruce Springsteen, Whitney Houston, Bud Abbott, and a whole lot more that won't fit in the character limit. Check my profile for part 3 I promise it's up because these were all written and posted within the same 10 mins.
New Jersey is the most amazing state with good tomatoes bagels pizza etc.
That's the end of New Jersey - Part 2 part 3 is up on my profile go look it IS there i promise you.