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A sex act involving meticulous preparation whereby a male (or female with penis) shaves his testicles, gooch and head and proceeds to store the shaven hair. Step two requires minor culinary skills in that a couple of Mars Bars must be heated in a pan and brought to highly viscous (thick), yet fluid, syrup. The newly created concoction (after cooling to a lukewarm temperature) is then carefully lathered onto the perpetrator’s earlier prepared erected penis and testicles. All the shaven hair is generously applied to the chocolate-coated trouser snake until it is completely covered to create an ‘ewok-type’ appeal. The final, and crucial, step is to coax a female to initiate the art of felatio on you and, in a jack-in-the-box-style maneuver, reveal your Middle Eastern Mars Bar.
*NB: It should be noted the Mars Bar syrup possesses both a practical and aesthetic qualities:
Practical – to allow the hair to stick;
Aesthetic – to act as a dark background to the hair
"She was coughing up chocolate fur balls for weeks after I gave her the Middle Eastern Mars Bar at Stylzie's place after Dirty Thursday"
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this fine phrase is used as a modern day equivalent of 'less is more' in regards to partners
shomer, meaning to guard in hebrew, and mars bar, in direct reference to a well known nougaty chocolatey treat combine in this well known phrase as a means of refraining from physical contact with the opposite sex.
whilst its ancient origins are some what unknown today,it is believed that its original roots are based on a scale of sickness.
one mars bar= perfect. its really nice innit?
two=umm feeling a bit sick now
three= i really dont want another mars bar
four= ewww get it away from me
..... etc
upto 23 mars bars= the mars bars gang up and kill you.
it is therefore wholly reasonable to draw a conclusion that one mars bar, that special mars bar is best for all involved.
dalia:you just annihilated that clay pigeon,high five shlodawgg!
emily: noooo you cant hes Shomer -ne- Mars Bar.
dalia: oh so sorry.
emily: i just dropped my favourite toothbrush off the side of the empire state building. can i have a hug?
Shleminem: no im Shomer -ne- Mars Bars.
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A sex act involving meticulous preparation whereby a male (or female with penis) shaves his testicles, gooch and head and proceeds to store the shaven hair. Step two requires minor culinary skills in that a couple of Mars Bars must be heated in a pan and brought to highly viscous (thick), yet fluid, syrup. The newly created concoction (after cooling to a lukewarm temperature) is then carefully lathered onto the perpetrator’s earlier prepared erected penis and testicles. All the shaven hair is generously applied to the chocolate-coated trouser snake until it is completely covered to create an ‘ewok-type’ appeal. The final, and crucial, step is to coax a female to initiate the art of felatio on you and, in a jack-in-the-box-style maneuver, reveal your Middle Eastern Mars Bar.
*NB: It should be noted the Mars Bar syrup possesses both practical and aesthetic qualities:
Practical - to allow the hair to stick;
Aesthetic - to act as a dark background to the hair
"She was coughing up chocolate fur balls for weeks after I gave her the Middle Eastern Mars Bar at Stylzie's place after Dirty Thursdays"
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Code phrase for heading to bathroom to take a dump.
I need to Drop Trump off at Mar-a-lago
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Another way of saying "Are you joking?!"
Guy 1 "I shagged her last night!"
Guy 2 "Wash your mars bar!
Or,
"Your washing my mars bar!"
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Deep, angst-ridden, thinker, feeler, poet-doctor-type (like Omar Shariff as Dr. Zhivago) who also happens to be married.
Kate: Who was that? He seems very nice.
Janet: Oh, he's a new faculty. Nice, I suppose, but he's
an Omarami ("O-MAR-rawh-mee"), y'know.
Kate: Ohhhhh...I didn't even think to check!
A wonderful series of relationship books by John Gray.
After reading Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus, she realized the valueable truth in them.
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