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The act of receiving fellatio while in a porta potty, outhouse or general wilderness setting
While not ideal, Brian could not pass up the chance to receive a Rustic Blumpkin during an emergency deuce at the country festival porta potty by a townie.
The seductive art of performing oral sex on a homeless person while they are simultaneously feasting on the contents of your dinner's to-go box.
I really wanted to give the homeless guy an Hobo Blumpkin but he doesn't eat pork.
Unimpressive blow job while taking a shit
Woman: was it good for you?
Man: Eh, tatty blumpkin.
The act of receiving fellatio while one is dropping a deuce in a squat toilet.
That Thai lady boi gave Henry a Japanese Blumpkin….he didn’t even see her balls hanging as he pinched that massive loaf.
A solo version of a blumpkin usually performed by jerkin it while taking a dump. It is usually performed by a Cringelord to the memory of some unrequited love. If the performer is short a couple ribs, either through surgical means or birth defect, may also be done full-simulation style.
Person A: Hey man, where did Cringelord go? he isn't bothering your friend again is he? I mean he's been after her so long when she's made it clear she just isn't that into him.
Person B: Nah, he just went to take a dump.
Person A: Oh, so he's doing a simulated blumpkin?
Person B: Yup...
The action of giving a blowjob to an individual having a bowel movement on the toilet, followed by eating the contents of their ass with their tongue
Steven got drunk last night and ended up giving Freddie Freeman a frosted blumpkin
The male drinks a whole bottle of hot sauce, then when his stomach gets ready to explode the girl fills her mouth with jalapeño peppers and blows him while he's shitting, making sure to pay attention to his dickhole.
Me: Larry why are you walking so funny?
Larry: My girlfriend gave me a Devil's Blumpkin last night and I'm burning through my dickhole to my asshole.