Desk Rage

The peak of office employee stress levels which ultimately starts with the screaming of vulgar language within the workplace. It can often times lead to assaulting fellow employees, abusing office equipment and/or stealing of company property, abusing sick days and ultimately poor production at work. A possible side effect is that the employee continues to take out his or her rage at their residence in the form of kicking small animals and drinking heavily.

With my pending at work and the amount of people calling me each day I'm on the brink of desk rage and one day I'm going to break and take it out on that weird guy that sits next to me.

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Desk Weed

The small bits of marijuana crumbs found in the small crevices and corners of your desk at home or maybe at work, who knows anymore.

Oh look, I found some Desk Weed!

Driving a desk

Pejorative term for administrative work done by a military officer from the comfort and safety of headquarters, rather than out in the field where the real danger lies.

To say that Ritter was amazed didn't begin to explain matters. This guy was supposed to be a professional military officer. The taking of human life was part of his job description. Of course, Ritter told himself, Cutter'd spent most of his career driving a desk in the Pentagon - he probably hadn't seen much blood since he learned how to shave. (Clear and Present Danger, by Tom Clancy)

Desk fat

A raging erection which occurs whilst sitting at a desk, often in a work situation after a scantily clad co-worker passes by, or occasionally on television panel programs where one of the hosts is sitting next to a rather fit lady who oozes sex. Given the public nature of this erection, the individual with the desk fat is unable to leave the safety of the desk for fear of being exposed as a deviant until the desk fat subsides

Lehmo was seated next to The Veronicas on this evening's edition of The Project, and given they project their sexuality in such an overt manner, Lehmo found himself with an enormous desk fat the moment the interview began

Desk wetting

Desk wetting is the process of relieving yourself at your desk, usually to mark territory.

MasterYodaStarWars11: Hey what are you doing, John?
JohnTheMeme0_0: Im desk wetting obviously. I don't want you to come near my precious internet memes.

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Desk Job

A blow job given from under a desk while the recipient sits at said desk.

Monica Lewinsky didn't have a desk job, but she sure gave one.

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Desk Jockey

Someone who has a shitty job and is stuck behind a desk and a computer all day long.

Converygs is desk jockey central! Friends dont let friends work at Convergys!

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