A person who in real life lacks actual intelligence but on social media regularly post "deep" statuses or tweets that show their "emotional" sides. Phacebook Philosophers rarely ever live by these teachings and these post are done almost purely to give the allusion of sophistication. They often tell of success and the future and sound good on paper. Occasionally they will sprinkle God's name in the post to add a religious aspect to the mix. The most common Phacebook Philosophers are hoes.
Hoe's Post on Facebook - "Everyone is gonna hurt you but you have to find the ones worth suffering for."
This hoe allows herself to be used continuously and is apparently oblivious to it. She is a Phacebook Philosopher.
Hoe's Post on Facebook - "Going to Bible Study tonight!!"
Little do you know that she is merely going for social purposes if at all. And the amount of dick she will suck afterwards will counteract any good she's done previously that day. She is a Phacebook Philosopher.
Someones who get drunk and stoned and engage in heavy philosophical conversations with nothing to back up their opinions other than their primal sincerity.
We are just pothead philosophers with no type of studious background whatsoever.
A person who commonly discusses the philosophies of life with his/her self while in the shower. Often times these people will come out of the shower with some realization of something in life.
Person 1: "What took you so long in there?"
Person 2: "I was wondering which language deaf people think in."
Person 1: "Ah. You must be a shower philosopher."
Person 2: "Yeah, I guess you could say that."
An individual unable to come up with an original thought that wants to say something profound, but doesn't even know what profound means!!! So they surf the web for famous philosophers to plagiarize in an attempt to sound more intelligent, illuminated, and enlightened. The only people impressed by this are their other illiterate, backwoods, toothless, hillbilly friends that think dental floss is used to sabiki bait fish.
Jill -Reading her facebook news feed wants to say something philosophical so she quotes Buddha by saying - "All that we are is the result of what we have thought"
Jack- Wow Jill is such a Facebook Philosopher someone should tell her how intelligent she is!
267๐ 82๐
AKA drunken Socrates
A person whom after becoming intoxicated engages in very deep philosophical conversations. Philosophical drunks are generaly powerless alone yet if more than one are present, these conversations can last hours if not days giving non-philosophical drunks early hang-overs.
Fred is a nice guy, but when he gets drinking he turns into a philosophical drunk and wont shut up.
58๐ 14๐
People who think the know everything on youtube. And to prove their knowledge, they fight with fifteen year old teens on video comments. Most of the time these comments have nothing to do with the video and end up being about how America is better then England or vice verso.
Video on: Bad Touch (Bloodhound Gang)
Teen: haha, having sex like an animal
Youtube Philosopher: @Teen. People actually do that sir.
Teen: @Philosopher, yeah like your mom.
*Continues for pages*
29๐ 6๐
Being in a deep state of thought as a result of consuming marijuana
"How high were you last night?"
"I was philosopher stoned"
12๐ 2๐