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Awesome 1754-1782 abolitionist soldier with enough salt to bury Aaron Burr alive. Didn't love turtles that much, but instead everything in nature. Kicked ass, used sass, all of it with extra class. Seriously, that guy was a reckless little shit though. Really wanted to form a black regiment, but never got to do that. Killed himself smartly at an ambush on the 27th of August 1782, and even invited some ladies to watch the battle. Very super totally highly probable that he was in love with Francis Kinloch and Alexander Hamilton.
Basic bi!ch: Omg John Laurens was such a innocent turtle boii and helpless GIRL WITH A DICK cinnamon roll uwu
Laurens: *floats down from heaven, shoots the b!tch, salutes to everyone normal in the room, dissapears*
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John Laurens is relatable, he's gay and dead
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A man of focus, commitment, and sheer fucking will. He's not the boogieman. He's the guy you send to kill the fucking boogieman.
I once saw him (John Wick) kill three men in a bar with a pencil. A fuuocking pencil. Who the fouck can do that?
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How am I supposed to pull that kind of money out of my John Duane?
He's got a stick up his John Duane.
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The formal pronunciation of House Speaker John Boehner, incorrectly said to be "John Bayner".
"Didn't pass a bill for hurricane sandy? Shuts down the government? What a John Boner."
"John Boner's name explains himself."
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John finally graduated high school and is now going off to knee on “innocent” black peoples necks while working for the Alexandria Police Department. But John cant lay off the drugs sadly died at the age of 33 by overdosing on prescription painkillers cause he blew his back out fucking all the cougars at a Moltey Crüe concert.
Rest In Peace John Balfanz say hello to Hitler for me please
Though John Laurens may have been gay, he had many other great personality traits. John Laurens was an anti-slave abolitionist alive during the late 1700's. He was interested in nature (mostly plants, birds, and other creatures he often drew) (not just turtles.), medical studies (though he did not study it), and was an aide-de-camp alongside a more popular figure, Alexander Hamilton; the two are speculated to have been in an amorous relationship. John Laurens married Martha Manning out of pity after impregnating her after he broke up with a man named Francis Kinloch, who has was also speculated to have had an amorous relationship with.
John Laurens was a strong man who was not a cinnamon roll.
John Laurens was reckless and got shot multiple times, which eventually led to his death.
John Laurens did not like turtles all that much and ate turtle soup once.
John Laurens was actually really tall and independent and also pretty suicidal. Poor guy.
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