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Americans

Citizens who live inside a big bubble between Canada and Mexico.

Americans makes up less than 5% of the worlds population yet 95% of the worlds ignorance and arrogance.

Traits and habits-

Calling themselves the only Americans despite the fact that ALL people living on the CONTINENT of America are Americans.

Calling things by their brand names rather than the name of the actual object or item.

Putting their country first in every online list despite the fact the United States starts with a U and the lists are in alphabetical order.

Putting an American flag next to 'English' for language selection incase they forget what language they speak.

Making fun of the metric system, despite the fact that they are one of only three countries who are yet to start using it. The rest of the world has been using it for over 50 years.

Killing each other is also a favourite pastime. More Americans are murdered by other Americans every year than all the American casualties of every war the world has ever seen. Pretty sad statistic.

Not all Americans are fat and stupid, and not all the world are anti-American. We just dont like arrogant ignorant idiots. It just so happens that The United States is always represented by arrogant ignorant idiots.

All the Americans who give a thumbs up are the exception to the rule who can actually think for themselves and can hopefully start representing their country in a better light.

Americans - LOL. He spelled favorite with a U. Everyone knows theres no U.

Brit- Actually, the entire english speaking world beside you, use it. It was an established language long before you were around.

American - You're wrong. We're right.

Australian - we use U.

Canadian - and us.

South African - yep, and us.

Kiwi - count us in.

Rest of UK - As do we

American - LOL. 85% of the english speaking world cant spell.

Canadian - actually its you....

American - Fuck you . I'm Americaaaaaaaaaaaan! Aluminum!

Australian - You do realise the metal is actually called Aluminium?

South African - Aluminium foil because its made from the metal ALUMINIUM.

Kiwi - Aluminium sheeting made from ALUMINIUM.

Canadian - check your periodic table.

American - You're wrong, and Realize has a Z not an S.

Brit - *sigh* thats YOUR spelling. The rest of us use S not Z.

American - LOL. You said ZED when its ZEE. Im Americaaaaaaaaan!

by Kupotan October 29, 2009

305👍 270👎


American

What do you call someone who can speak 3 languages? Trilingual.
What do you call someone who can speak 2 languages? Bilingual.
What do you call someone who can speak 1 language? American.

That tourist is definitely American... we're in Japan and he can't say a single word of Japanese.

by Hazelmay June 13, 2009

347👍 318👎


american

A native of the most despised nation on earth. Probably obscenely fat.

Person 1: "Look, there's one of the tiny number of Americans that's ever travelled abroad."
Person 2: "Christ, he's fat. I detest him, and his culture."

by Antiseptic August 16, 2007

386👍 354👎


Americanic

having characteristics of or attributed to Americans or America.

I enjoy fine Americanic bourbons, such as Jack Daniels.

by ryand2116 March 9, 2019


American

A language

“Do you speak Chinese?” “Idk, do you speak American?”

by It’sCanadaGeeseBruudha June 17, 2019


American

(N)

- Not lesbian, not of lesbian nature, not attracted to females.

Gerenifericashley: "Do you know if she's lesbian?"
Bob: "She's American."
Gerenifericashley: "Fuck, there goes my chances."

by manicmvvn May 26, 2020


American

Americans are pretty amazing, not going to lie! ;) We are powerful, smart, brave, and generous! Just so you know, I am an American and I have travelled to almost every country in the world, I aced geography which is (oh yeah) REQUIRED to pass lower school so i doubt that any Americans can't locate Europe or anywhere else on a map, I have never ever even been inside a fast food restaurant in my life (shocker eh?), and there is not ONE fat person in my entire private school!!

Person 1 = look at that tall, attractive, well groomed, well dressed, polite guy with amazing teeth!
Person 2 = must be American! :)

by balletgirl941401 July 3, 2010

98👍 83👎