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Old man spits wisdom off the dome, opps be warned
"{Yo she musta listened to Dracula flow the way she dropped that ass on me at an egregarious angle.
a used tampon. due to it resembling a tea bag (the string), and being full of blood would make a nice brew for dracula :)
i wanted to fuck my missus but she had a draculas tea bag in.
my bird was on, as i found when i stuck my fingers in and touched dracula's teabag
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1. The worst movie ever made... ever. It contains no plot, comedy, horror, propper costumes, violence, action, or nudity. I feel embarassed to be living on the same planet as this movie.
2. Anything that's blatantly and insurmountably bad.
1. Joe: I watched Dracula 3000 yesterday... now I have syphilis.
2. Man, that cake was so Dracula 3000.
40👍 11👎
A slang term for one who brings misery or sucks the fun out of a party or other gathering.
Luke used to be cool until that fun dracula Lindsey started dating him.
We call her the fun dracula because of the way she sucks all the fun out of our lives.
50👍 17👎
It's a common misconception that a Dracula Sneeze is the act of sneezing into your elbow pit, but this is not the case. A Dracula Sneeze is when a vampire sneezes, accidentally turning them into a bat.
Your friends probably have already caught on, before seeing this being that you don't show any skin in the sunlight due to burning, (which is why we only hangout with NonVamps (NVs) A.K.A. BloodBanks at night, and make up excuses like saying we're working when they ask to chill during the day.),
This is assuming that you aren't a darker-skinned female (or any skin tone, if done properly, and if you don't speak and are a shorter/slimmer male, the disguise can work as well.) that pretends to be a muslim and covers every inch of skin in fabric, known as Musliars, except it has no prevention from Dracula Sneezes. Not many fellow vampires are aware of this method due to the demographic that uses/invented it having a considerably small population in our community.
Unlike popular media portrays, transforming into a bat and back isn't something that's easily done on command, comparable to the difficulty of orgasming on command, which is also a way to turn, called a Draculasm Which is even harder to do to turn back, since the only practical way is to mate with another bat, vampire or not, and Draculasm. However, only another vampire can impregnate a female vamp.
Malicus: "Where's Eliza? It's time I tell her she's been my crush for 200 years"
Joe:"A month ago I saw her Dracula Sneeze in front of our NV group and fly off"
M:"Is she's okay?"
J: "She flew into a flight of bats so she's safe from preds"
M: "Well thank hell she's alright"
J:"I know ri-wait that's her!"
*Eliza walks in, derobing her musliar*
J:"Thank Hell you survived what happened? And Malicus has something to tell you after"
M:"Eliza you're okay!"
E: "I am! After I turned I grouped with bats led by a Fox Bat. I did what I had to with them except I didn't Draculasm which is what took so long.
J:"The?"
E:I didn't know he was a Vamp. I should've when he told the other bats to join in. He said it would help. It didn't even when they were vamps. I never thought my first would be with bats"
J:"How did you turn back?"
E:"I flew into a dust storm and kept sneezing. I didn't know if I'd stop as a vamp or bat so i feel lucky not having to give birth as one"
J:"Where is the vamp?"
E: "They changed course as soon as they saw and flew away laughing"
J:"I'm so sorry"
E"Wild ride amirite? But the worst part was trying to stay out of the sun"
M: *mumbling*
"ThisIsn'tHappeningThisIsn'tHap-"
E:"Wasn't there something you wanted to tell me? I love surprises!"
M: "Oh, I wanted to tell you that I uh had a, I"
*Malicus ran into the street immediately bursting into flaming guts, it being the middle of the day in the summer*
J: "All due to a measly Dracula Sneeze"
Used sanitary towel.
Vampire snack food.
My girlfriend didn't flush hard enough and left her Dracula's poptart floating in the bog.
Fun Dracula(s) can often be identified by a few distinguishing characteristics.
1. A large, bulbous cranium.
2. Small, squinty, Asian-looking eyes.
3. Long, giraffe-like necks, capable of reaching great heights.
Lindsey has a large head, long neck, and might be Asian; I bet she is a Fun Dracula!
18👍 5👎