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An unspeakable sex act involving reenacting the most important parts of Canadian history. Let's just say, someone plays the Queen, and the other person has to ask permission to secede at some point towards the end.
Also involved: Question Hour in the House of Commons.
"Man, we were working on a Canada's History, and she got all Stephen Harper on my ass."
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Canada's History is summed up as Two Girls in a cup, Tub Girl, The Stanley Cup, Bottle of Maple Syrup, Beavers, Moose Antlers, and Rocky and Bullwinkle all having sex while watching Stargate.
The most horrific thing you could possibly imagine, Canada's History.
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It begins fairly normally, with a man receiving a blowjob (from an individual of any sex). The man ejaculates into the Stanley cup, previously filled with a bottle of maple syrup. The man should swirl the mixture with his penis until it has a thick consistency.
The next step is to apply the mixture to the blowee's head. Once applied, put the antlers on their head so the dried semen/syrup mixture will act as an adhesive.
To wrap it up, wrap the man's meat in some Canadian Bacon, grab a brewsky and fuck the night away with your new moose.
Steven: Man, you look exhausted!
John: I sure am! Ann and I tried out Canada's History last night because I was super horny.
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One day America took a shit and put it on it's head. The end. Canada.
Canada's History, eh?
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A sex act so depraved, it must never be described. First referenced on the Colbert report.
Guy 1: Dude, i totally reviewed Canada's History with that girl.
Guy 2: Dude, you need help.
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Canada is the part of America we didnt want.
Too damn cold
Canadas History is a history of being too fucking cold!
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Most boring suburb of Los Angeles. More boring than the other suburbs of LA; there is absolutely nothing to do, including even a prosaic mall. Kids are stuck up, superficial and often nasty and mean-spirited. Moved here from NJ for the good public schools which was stupid because my parents had me and my sister apply to private and boarding schools anyway. We were trapped in a house without anyone my age for two years on a hill that was a mile from town where there was nothing to do anyway. The kids at my school were incredibly mean because I was new as a seventh grader and I spent the next decade recovering from suicidal depression and hating my life. DO NOT MOVE HERE
La Canada sucks.
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