Atkins diet

A crappy exscuse for a diet. People on it eat basically anything they want exept bread, pasta, fruit, and veggies.
Think it sounds stupid now? Well the guy who made it died of obesity!
The people who are actully stupid enough to go on it gain more weight than than they lose.
If you want to lose weight use slim-fast!

Someidiot: Jeez, I went on that Atkins diet and I gained 35 pounds. But I was only trying to lose 10.
Otheridiot: Yer lucky, I went on it and I gained 50!

3👍 22👎

diet coke head

A snobby girl, typically anorexic, clueless, believes the world revolves around her.

Susan are you not eating lunch again, you are turning into such a diet coke head.

15👍 7👎

Terri Schaivo Diet

Not partaking of any food or water for a good eleven days or so. Media coverage and candlelight vigils optional.

Jenny, I don't know if anyone has ever told you, but you have a substantial amount of back fat...ever consider the Terri Schaivo Diet?

32👍 20👎

Jerk-off Diet

Also referred to as "Jerk-off fasting", A technique used by men where you do not jerk-off for 3 or more days straight to obtain the most pleasure possible for when you finally do jerk-off after your fasting.

Brian: "Dude, i don't get pleasure from jerking off anymore."

Gary: "Do the Jerk-off Diet!"

Brian: "Good idea!"

8👍 3👎

Big eq diet

A diet used to be skinny enough to win equitation or hunter classes in the horse show world.

Typically consists of vast amounts of caffeine and a fruit flavored vape.

Yeah we’re on the big eq diet so we’re gonna stop at the gas station to grab a monster and a puff bar, that’s all we can have or our trainer will fat shame us.

Ghandi diet plan

When a person decides to stop eating entirely, like Ghandi

Kevin: hey you wanna go on a double date with our girls?
Derant: where?
Kevin: new McDonald's down-
Derant:nae, sorry man,Michelle is on this new Ghandi diet plan

80/20 diet

A simple diet plan of eating only 80% of healthy foods and 20% of unhealthy foods.

Eversince a coworker told me about the 80/20 diet I now only eat garden salads and fresh fruits during the week but, on the weekend it's nothing but, burgers, hotdogs, and fries.