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man who could not leave a barrel of whiskey behind, fought off a sea monster, and showed up for his own funeral in his home of Ireland.
In the great storm of 1781 John Jameson lost a barrel of his beloved whiskey. He said goodbye to the crew and went in after it.
75👍 6👎
a school of alpha males where the teachers force you to do pe and every couple of years a registered sex offender joins the long list of names of students from the school typically known as the owners of Purley they walk around like proper solid lads. also noted their headteacher looks like a hedgehog
Girl 1: “is that a John fisher lad”
Girl 2: “yeah he’s proper alpha ain’t he”
Fisher lad: “hello specimens, check out my new air max 97s”
38👍 2👎
The gorgeous frontman of The Maine, a band from Arizona. His birth name is John O'Callaghan, but he is often refered to as simply John O.
Girl 1: Hey that guy is HOT! What's his name?
Girl 2: JOHN O, duh.
260👍 29👎
John Delaney also known as the dude that is polling at a record-breaking 0%!
Person: "my wife just left me... and he sent me a video of her fucking a Dude!."
Person: "well... at least you are not John Delaney!"
A cute person, often a daddy that loves JJ and JJ does love so much. He loves hugs and wanted to you to sleep as much as possible. He also wants you to eat many times. A real cuddle bear. Love this guy so much.
John Francis is hella hot for reaaaal.
Someone who can't count, can't pay attention and thinks iPhones are for high class citizens. Someone who lies on their taxes and receives food stamps. Overall a scam artist/ mathematician. A horrible gift giver who often gives pasta for Valentines day.
Friend 1: I saw you lie on your taxes.
Friend 2: Man, I ain't no John Irwin!
Friend 1:What is 2x4?
Friend 2: 24
Friend 1: Real John Irwin aren't you?
Friend 1: I wish my Samsung would turn on.
Friend 2: Sure is a shame you got stuck with that peasant shit. iPhone are for only the high class citizens in America. #johnirwin
Boyfriend: I have a surprise for you, babe. It's not chocolate.
Girlfriend: Pasta?
Boyfriend: Yeah rep'n my original OG John Irwin.
Girlfriend: You know I don't eat carbs, right?
The real life gigachad, the sigma male king. He lifts all the plates in the gym and makes any girls panties wet simply by dming them one of his 10,000,000,000 memes, no matter how uptight and thotty they are he gets the coochie. He is awkward rejecting societal norms and dressing up like a filthy frank character just to outlift and imasculate every male on the planet, therefore he is the ultimate sigma male. He has the haack squat named after him.
Furthermore he is a true patriot. He blasts eminem, "now you're a man", and "murica fuck yeah" during his workouts. This contributes little to his overall chadliness and godlike abilities but it simply exemplifies his aura.
If aliens invade earth they'll go extinct the moment john haack finds out about them.