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Simply stated, a polite term for a cocksucker.
Fuck you, you worthless little penis vacuum!!!
A mysterious object, said to have been lost long ago. Nobody has ever seen it, not even Kimmel himself. Prevailing theories on the matter include his penis being absorbed back into his body to make his boobs bigger, getting lost under his stomach fat, and Kimmel eating it as a small child.
"What's that fleshy pink thing in the closet"
"I'm pretty sure that's Kimmel's penis"
"Should we give it to him?"
"Nah leave it there he doesn't use it"
A male with a penis so small or gives off small penis energy.
Man Justus is such a homophobe I bet he has a shrimp penis!
Penis resort 1. is a means of resolving issues/problems that occurred beteween opposite sexes by having sex with that person.
2. refers to using sex as a means of re-starting stalled conversation.
3. refers to resuming normal relationship (after having sex) without discussing the underlying issues which caused lack of communication or misunderstandign in the first place.
Your Friend: "How is it going with your girl-friend? I haven't seen you guys together for the last few days?"
You: "All of a sudden she was upset for reasons unknown to me. And she is not talking to me."
Your friend: "Then what are you going to do about it?"
You: " I tried all I can to get her attention except for penis resort."
The next day:
Your Friend: "Did you talk to her?"
You: "Thanks to penis resort, things are back to normal."
Your Friend: "That is wonderful."
You: "Penis resort is a great normalizer, a silent peace maker."
When u grow up with a best friend read porn together and think ur the man. Then he alludes to the fact women like large perfect dicks and how much better it would be for them.
When fall from grace and realise u will never feel safe in a relationship as long as he is around ur woman.
When u give up and watch them flirt.
When her joy when he is around is arousing.
When all u can think about is her pleasure.
When all she can think about is him.
When all u can think about is him.
When all u can both think about is him.
When she starts asking about him.
When his name is on both ur lips and almost say it whenever u want to speak to one another.
When she wants to marry u cause she know he won’t stay in that way.
When u give in and watch him make her cum so hard no one will ever believe u if u told them.
When ur raising his children and he is happily married his wife is happy, ur wife is happy, and ur the only one who isn’t.
When u realise ur addicted to the crushing reality of her orgasms with him.
When he controls ur and her with envy and u can’t help submitting.
When u realise no one noticed ur children look like him, no one knows what is going on. Just u 3.
When u wish u could die but the addiction is worth living for.
When u die and stand before God and he says “ why didn’t u trust in the small dick I gave u?” And u say nothing…
Wife: I can’t stop thinking about him, I see his face everywhere I go..
U: same..
Wife: he came over this after noon while u were at work..
U: he knows I have penis envy.
Wife: really? So he has a big dick does he?
U: :(
Wife: :)
When a girl strives for affirmation from her mother by wishing she had a penis lol
X: Gosh I wished I had a penis!
Y: girl that's penis envy