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The best advice for the just-married, otherwise clueless-in the-bedroom, groom (or equally inexperienced LGBTQ married couple with at least one 'female' participant).
Hey, don't forget. No matter what, while yer down there Licking the Alphabet...don't forget to write a letter to Santa.
HOLY SHIT IT'S JUST TWINKLE TWINKLE LITTLE STAR
Guy: I JUST REALISED THE ALPHABET SONG IS TWINKLE LITTLE STAR
Other Guy:My childhood is destroyed
A is for Alone; and always complaining how you are just that.
B is for Bracelets; but any wrist adornment will do.
C is for Crying.
D is for Dyed Black Hair.
E is for Emotion; and exaggerating every one you have.
F is for FLOORPUNCH!!!
G is for Glasses; preferably thick black rims.
H is for Heartbreak. boo hoo.
I is for the Intense Pain you feel from your unrequited love.
J is for Jilted Lover.
K is for Kissing; and whining about how you aren't doing it.
L is for Labeling yourself.
M is for Mood swings.
N is for Never having any friends who care about you.
O is for "Old Man Pants".
P is for "Picked Last in Gym Class"; and other cliches of the sort.
Q is for Questiong your self worth.
R is for Remembering the times when things were wonderful, and then crying about how much your life sucks.
S is for Sweaters.
T is for Thrift stores.
U is for Underdeveloped Muscles; because you have to be out of shape, one way or another, to be emo.
V is for Veganism.
W is for Whining about how everything is so terrible, and your parents that make six figures can't buy you the love that you want.
X is for X-Girlfriends, and talking about the pain that they bring you.
Y is for Your miserable existance.
Z is for Zooming in with your camera, because you're a photographer.
You wanna try being emo? Read the emo alphabet.
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A masterpiece of a story where the characters are all letters. It is unironically better than any anime and marvel movie ever made, with no dialogue it tells a story with a deep history and yet all the letters are able to say is their own name. All things considered it is a true masterpiece and should win an Oscar.
Have you watched alphabet lore?
yeah, shit was unironically better than anything Marvel has done in years
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A slang term meaning C.I.A, F.B.I, I.R.S, D.A, P.O, or C.O
Yo, ball out Squalie, dem alphabet boys is comin.
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An alphabet used by NATO in order to clearly speak over a radio. Used for call signs, tail numbers on planes, abbreviations, and anything which would require letters be spoken over the radio
Alpha
Bravo
Charlie
Delta
Echo
Foxtrot
Golf
Hotel
India
Juliet
Kilo (KEE-lo)
Lima (LEE-ma)
Mike
November
Oscar
Papa (pa-PA)
Quebec (KAY-beck)
Romeo
Sierra
Tango
Uniform
Victor
Whiskey
X-ray
Yankee
Zulu(ZOO-loo)
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An encompassing and easier means to address the non-heterosexual people who are among the LGBTQIAPK crowd ( Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer, Intersexual, Asexual, Pansexual, and Kinkiness ). Saying "The Alphabet People" most likely will offend SJW's and liberal snowflakes, but it sure beats wasting your time and money taking a useless Gender Studies class.
Dave: "Hey, what happened at the party last night ? I thought trying to hook up Ethel with Milton would be a good idea. How come they never hit it off with one another ?"
John : " The reason Ethel and Milton weren't interested in each other is because both are part of The Alphabet People."
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