Corporate Wordsmithing

The combination of ordinary words into complex phrases by corporate personnel to appear smarter than they are.

Corporate Wordsmithing: Our flawless execution will enhance the customer experience of our iconic brand allowing us to leverage synergies while building strategic partnerships thereby elevating employee engagement through deep dive analysis and constructive feedback.

Corporate Culture

A prescribed method of turning everyone into an obedient drone with a plastic smile and fake enthusiasm for their daily dose of abuse from people who probably don't know shit about the actual mechanics of their operations

The corporate culture of this firm implicitly requires employees to work in an environment that allows criticism and policy changes to be made by a management that is far removed from the daily operations of the company. Any form of deviation or disagreement with policy is severely frowned upon.

Corporate simp

Unlike the corporate whore, the corporate simp is a person that works their hardest not for monetary gain but for the sole purpose of making (upper) management happy, with complete disregard for their colleagues. The modern way of expressing that someone is a brownnose, suck up, and kiss ass.

Person 1: Management increased our new quota just because (Name) keeps staying late and taking on extra tasks!
Person 2: Yeah, he's become such a corporate simp!

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corporate drone

A mindless robot for the corporation. Someone who has "sold out". Goes along with all management initiatives and enjoys repeating corporate "jokes" like "is it Friday yet", and "didn't you get the memo about the red shirt",

Aaron used to be cool. Ever since he sold out he's nothing but a corporate drone.

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corporate puppet

(Noun) A person or person(s) who lack spine, backbone and common sense and blindly follow a corporate structure like a sheep rather than doing what is right or fair to preserve self respect and dignity.

Adam says one thing in private and then says exactly the opposite in front of all the coworkers in order to save face and only look out for himself, he is one of the biggest corporate puppets I have ever met.

Roblox Corporation

A corporation that sued Ruben Sim for exposing their worker for following a nsfw furry account

Roblox Corporation: you have forfeited your life privileges, ruben sim C:<

Corporate racoon

A person—a scavenger of sorts, who, throughout the
course of the workday, roams his/her company halls, meeting rooms and
cavernous spaces in search of any kind of food or drink—even of the stale
variety. Because of the corporate racoon’s cheap nature and “if it’s free,
I’ll take it! Even if it’s garbage” mentality, this character doesn't care
what it is as long it can be stuffed down his/her throat.

Example 1:
"Dude, look at Hank scrunched in the corner over there. Is he scarfing down
that old-ass sandwich?"

"Yikes, Hank, you hungry much? Those sandwiches are from a meeting that finished five hours ago. That meat looks sick and the mayonnaise stinks. You sick bastard."

"Hey man, can't help it. I'm a Corporate racoon. I obviously need help."

“Help? Dude, you’re disgusting. Throw that shit out.”

Example 2:
"Hey, Trisha, where'd you get the turkey wrap?"

"I was walking by the conference room and scarfed it from leftovers from that meeting that ended three hours ago, before they cleaned up the mess."

"Disgusting -- you are nothing but a corporate racoon."