Facebook Escalation

When someone posts something to their facebook status and a thread evolves from it that escalates the status until commenters feel it necessary to seek out the poster by other means such as IM or even phone call.

Status Update: Girl 1 is 7 days in, and not looking back! :+).

Guy 1: ???
Girl 2: ???
Girl 2: haha...Guy 1 and I posted the same thing at the exact same time....Freaky!
Guy 1: I know, right? I barely hit enter when I got an email saying "Girl 2 also posted a comment"
Girl 2: Freaky! Great minds think alike! : )
Guy 1: Now if only Girl 1 was as fast to respond if we were :p
Girl 2: Maybe sometime next week we'll get a response :P 
Guy 1: A week? I don't have that kind of time!! Maybe I should call her?
Girl 2: Yeah, she might get back to you by Friday if you do that! Lol
Guy 1: I got ahold of her on IM! She claims she'll come respond!
Guy 1: This has become a classic case of Facebook Escalation!

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Escalator Express Lane

Typically the left side of an escalator dedicated to speedy individuals who don't have the time or patience to let the escalator take them where they need to go, therefore, they angrily speed-hop (sometimes taking double steps) up or down the moving staircase and pass everyone on the right side, leaving them with the following possible impressions:

"I'm more important than you; shove it"
"I'm wearing a suit and have places to be"
"Oh shit I'm late I'm late I'm late"
"I have to catch a bus, get out of my way or I'll trip you"

You can use this method to your advantage, but if you fall on your ass and go tumbling down the moving stairs, you're on your own.

Stacy totally just fell down the escalator express lane! She was moving too fast for her own good.

What!? Is she okay?

She'll be fine. She was on her ass but fortunately still moving upwards.

Coming down the escalator

A phrase used to describe the first in a series of very bad decisions.

I can't help but feel like he might be coming down the escalator...

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That De-Escalated Quickly

When something shocking happens and someone reaction escalates quickly, but then they dial it back almost immediately.

Me: I have more followers than you now, lol.
Brandy: WHAT THE FUCK
Brandy: At least I have more than Joseph lol.
Me: That de-escalated quickly.

North Korea: We gonna bomb Guam!
U.S : YOU WILL BE MET WITH FIRE AND FURY!!!
Both Countries: *sit around doing nothing, with the occasional empty threat*
Me: That de-escalalated quickly.

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The violence has escalated

It means you’re fucked.

“The violence has escalated.”

“ ✅ OK”

Took The Top Escalator

A phrase referring to the brief period between dying and being dead.

Based on the belief that you pass on to a heavenly state.

Mate 1: Gran...gran...?
Mate 2: Dude. She took the top escalator.
Mate 1: <cough> arrgh
Mate 2: Man what is that noise?!
Mate 1: sorry. I was just humadruming.
Mate 2: You're sick dude - how can you be bored?!

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escalability

Describes how easy something can be escalated. Often occurs in the business context, especially within big companies with complex matrix structures that require frequent escalations.

A: We need to escalate the pricing discussions.
B: Our escalability is good. I will escalate it.