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One who councils another late at night and gives them advice on their problems via facbook chat.
"I didn't know what to do until I talked to my facebook guru last night"
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Those days when EVERYONE decides to come and talk to you about their problems and ask you for advice.
Gosh, I'm having a guru day today, didn't get any study done at all!
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one who has little knowledge of agricultural farming, yet owns everybody in farmville on facebook.
eddie is the consummate farmville guru.
When a Narcissistic ex-teacher disowns a student for becoming an individual.
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"Hey, you presenting at the convention this year ?"
"Nah. Got serious guru block.."
(n.) The center position on a three cushion couch typically occupied by a neophyte pot smoker who by virtue of his location is offered two tokes off a joint or a pipe for every one of his compatriots. Since the "guru" is usually too inexperienced to refuse a hit, he gets much more stoned than his friends resulting in endless fun at the "guru's" expense.
Friend 1: You're in the guru seat, so you gotta take a hit every time the joint comes your way.
Guru: Cool. You guys are awesome.
Friend 2: No, man. You're awesome. Now take another hit, bitch. Guru seat rules apply.
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Guru Gossip (sometimes Gossiper) is a messy, poorly run message board masquerading as an honest space where members can vent freely about internet and beauty culture, mainly Youtube MUAs comme Jeffree Star, Michelle Phan, or Jaclyn Hill.
There are endless threads devoted to a variety of gurus and Internet personalities where you slowly realize that it is nothing more than a circlejerk for lonely women to engage in petty, childish, high school-like behavior. Members are subtly encouraged to degrade their targets for their appearance, to invade their privacy by looking up addresses and contacts, and are constantly looking for ways to report them to law enforcement for things like buying purebred pug puppies or having too many kids.
All the while the gossipers will compare themselves to prove just how successful, prettier, and much nicer they are than them, which leaves you wondering how someone can be so rich and happy, when they’re spending hours a day ranting about assymetrical noses and sponsored trips.
Abigail: I found a thread on Danielle Mansutti on Guru Gossiper!
Tanya: You’re kidding, what does it say? Is it anything good?
Abigail: No, it’s horrible. They spent five pages fighting with each other because one person had the audacity to admit she thinks she’s naturally very pretty!
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When an absolutely insanely gorgeous beautiful woman is intensely staring at her computer and learning like a guru. It's a total package if she is gorgeous ad intelligent.
My fiance is a total gorgeous guru. I watch football and she learns things in her computer at the same time. This usually results in a symbiotic relationship.