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While receiving fellatio, hide two handfuls of cotton balls behind your back. Finish on the broads face, then apply the cotton balls for a Santa like beard.
After unwrapping my Christmas gifts from Kesha, I gave her one hell of a Santa Claus
6👍 17👎
A school shooter who is making a list and checking it twice
"hey you know chris right?'"
"Yeah I think he's a Santa Clause"
"oh shit he's reaching in his bag"
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When a guy nuts in another guy's beard and then licks it off his beard.
I was with this guy the other night and it was so hot when he gave me the Santa Claus. Christmas does cum more than once a year!
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Pulling out of your male partners ass then ejaculating on their face. You would then use the semen to draw a mustache and beard (white like Santa Claus).
Damn rick, your ass is so tight. Now be a good little elf and let me Santa Claus you'
11👍 44👎
A talking piece of poo who says: "Howdy Ho! Ho! Ho!" , as seen on South Park (those guys are so smart).
If you see santa claus floating in the toilet then be sure to flush it down so the next person doesn't have to see/look at it.
11👍 53👎
While pile driving a girl in the ass, you pull out her tampon and whip her back and yell "Go Dasher and Dancer".
I was banging my first cousin and yelled "Go Dasher and Dancer". Then I yelled...I'm Santa Claus Bitch!!!
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The poor quality batteries that arrive already installed in electronic toys that you'd recieve on Christmas. Typically green and red, gold and red, or any combination of the three. And ususally weighing about half of what a duracell, or energizer would weigh. Toshiba is a common brand of Santa Claus batteries
person 1- Dude, did you get barreries for the digital camera?
person 2- Yeah man. They're those silver ones, ya know, the kind with the black cat jumping through the number nine.
person 1- Oh fuck! Those are like santa claus batteries. They don't even have the power to turn the camera on!
53👍 3👎