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the guy who turns off your computer because he wants to. entitled man whos 40% gay.
"hey youre annoying"
"i know its because im a jon"
lets just say hes pwitty cwacked at fortine, also a big hit with the dordy sorts😉, he has a 2inch dick and likes his tummy being tiggled. btw hes gonna make prob 1mil a yr from his gold card (50% get it).
#loveislove
#gaypower
#dordy sorts come my way. @jonjw14
Jon is a man of great substance, and a teller of tales. Jon would sit on his porch surrounded by the vagrants of the world, telling tales of small butt plugs he maneuvered and McGuyvered in times of need; tales of the seedy underbelly of dildo factories, and tales on how to get a free hamburger on a Tuesday, to name a few.
Men were jealous of Jon and women wanted him. They longed for Jon to satisfy them orally as Jon was known as the king of oral pleasure. When Jon performed oral on the lucky women… the geyser like wetness could be heard and seen for miles around.
Unsuspecting people would feel drops of fluid dripping down upon them when on evening walks and while grilling burgers in backyards.
In addition to the wetness felt blocks away, one could hear a ‘pop’ sound that can only be described as a wet hard hammer hitting a nail.
The women Jon performed oral on were sent away after having been serviced. They were never the same. They spent the rest of their lives searching….. searching …. For that feeling again; feeling of explosive intense pleasure.
Women would bring sandwiches to Jon and his dog a Charlie but to no avail.
Jon would accept their sandwiches and then send them on their way.
On warm days one can still smell the deli meat and the despair of the women Jon had turned away time and time again.
Jon was performing oral on a cross-eyed woman who could see straight immediately after reaching peak ecstasy.
A codeword for a quick fap session or masturbating
"hey imma go Jon real quick brb"
" I can't be very explicit now, but I was *jonning* about 20 mins ago that's why I didn't pick your call up"
Jon skips date day.
Jon ghosts the phone calls.
Don't be like Jon.
Fuck sake! He if he Jon's me one more time, we are done.
Biggest carrot cruncher you’ll meet
Mate that Jon is a massive carrot cruncher
Very smart intellectual Usually very friendly but also like to keep his distance You will love being around him but he won’t like being around you It’s a personal thing And don’t try him because he tends to take shit to the extreme and that’s not in your best intentions
Don’t play with that boy Jon be really like that