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Clear my Calendar

The process of pooping prior to a business meeting or other event that may keep you from using the bathroom. Pooping prior to the event, as such to avoid abrupt exits during the meeting.

Excuse me, I just need to clear my Calendar before our 3:00pm meeting.

by SS Cruiser August 15, 2022


day-by-day calendar

MOORPARK RESIDENTS ENJOY A COMMUNAL DUMP
actual newspaper headline

eat. spit. be happy.

by discolemonade July 12, 2004

6๐Ÿ‘ 14๐Ÿ‘Ž


Carbon-based Calendar

Significant female in a male's life who organises so many "things to do" that the male has no control over his own social timing.

Dave: Are you coming out for beers on Thursday?
Al: Not sure if I can. I'll check my carbon-based calendar tonight and get back to you tomorrow.

by NaughtyJim October 28, 2010

1๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


Non-denominational-end-of-Julian-Calendar-event

Politically Correct gone mad. Towards the end of the Julian Calendar cycle, the company you work for may invite you to an event formerly known as a Christmas Party.

Company email: You are hereby invited to the Non-denominational-end-of-Julian-Calendar-event. Please respond by Thursday if you wish to attend. There will be ham.
Employee response: No dice baby, I'm celebrating Christmas that day.

by NaughtyJim December 6, 2010


calendarize

In basketball, when one player dunks on another so many times that a calendar could be created consisting of dunk photos.

Getting dunked on one time is getting posterized, but getting dunked on many times is getting calendarized.

That was the definition of calendarize last night. Blake Griffin calenderized Aron Baynes in game 1. Poor guy was getting thrown down on every time he looked up.

by buster chestnutz April 20, 2015


Door-to-Door Calendar Salesman

Initially created to avoid having to say the term "groomer" (or relative terms such as "grooming") aloud when in the company of people, or in a place where you'd rather not have people hear you talking of such a topic. Especially when it comes to discussing the topic to someone who is easily triggered by the initial subject.

"Door-to-Door Calendar Salesman" is a code-term to use in place of a "child groomer."

"Selling calendars" means to commit the act of grooming.
"Going door to door" means they're searching for minors to groom.
"Asking a minor for calendars or photos of their calendars" means they're asking a minor for illegal sexual favours, or for sexually explicit photos of said minor.

Person A: "Have you heard that Onision has been going door to door and selling calendars?"
Person B: "What the fuck is up with that? Selling calendars...He should go to prison for it."

by horsehorsehorse December 25, 2021


check his calendar

To check his sanity.

"Can you imagine if Walter Alston wore a football helmet during the baseball game? They would truck him away, man. 'Get him out of the dugout, man. Check his calendar!'"
-George Carlin, An Evening With Wally Londo Featuring Bill Slazo

by indigenousprodigy May 12, 2008